Nov
27
I’m feeling a bit under the weather and uncreative today. So instead of the mildly amusing post you would normally get, I present you with the following scenario:
You have been wandering in the desert for 5 days. You have just finished off your canteen of water, and your camel Pricilla has collapsed from exhaustion, forcing you to continue on without him. Just when you are about to close your eyes for the big sleep, a Genie appears before you:
“Good day weary traveler! I am a Genie who has come to save you!”
“Do I get three wishes?” you ask.
“No! I will transport you out of the desert, but you will have to pay terrible consequences!” boasted the Genie.
“What kind of Genie are you?” you ask.
“I am an evil Genie!”
“You mean like in the movie Wishmaster?”
“No!” yelled the Genie. “That movie was terrible!”
“Oh”
After ten minutes of awkward silence, the Genie makes his offer.
“I will teleport you out of this desert and back to the comfort of your bed, but you will be marked by one of two things for the rest of your life. You will either have visible farts, causing a greenish-brown haze to surround you every time you fart, or you will have feet so smelly, you will need to wear three pairs of socks under your shoes in public to keep the smell contained. Taking your shoes off during sexy-time will also be extremely awkward! And you may never explain to anyone why you are the way you are! Make your choice, fool!”
What do you choose?
November 27th, 2006 at 9:46 am
Visible farts, definitely. Because I’d have to buy all new shoes if I had to wear three pairs of socks, and I really like my shoes. And I also really like being barefoot.
November 27th, 2006 at 9:52 am
Smelly feet. Sad to say.
November 27th, 2006 at 10:17 am
Stinky farts! Because farts are at least funny. No one ever laughed at Dr. Scholl.
November 27th, 2006 at 3:24 pm
Stinky farts…my kids LOOOOOOVe stinky farts
My two year old daughter laughed so hard at a fart joke on YouTube that she crapped herself.
November 27th, 2006 at 3:29 pm
Howard, Crunchy, you know I love you, but where did this “stinky fart” business come from? Pay attention people! VISIBLE FARTS. Completely different. The odor of the fart remains unchanged. Smokey-Greenish-Brown Haze coming out of your butt and surrounding you every time you fart.
November 27th, 2006 at 3:34 pm
I’d go with visible farts. But it depends on how far from civilization I was, I might just smack the genie and keep on my merry way, or die. But with the visible farts, you could hold it in until you are alone, then let em rip. I hope you feel better.
November 27th, 2006 at 3:56 pm
Visible farts, cuz my friends would get a kick out of it!
November 27th, 2006 at 7:23 pm
Visible farts. I feel they have more of a punch than stinky feet. But it will give away your location in a game of sardines.
November 27th, 2006 at 11:18 pm
visible farts or stinky feet? Craig, my love, you MUST be ill. Could these be your symptoms, eh? either way, i’d have to go with the visible farts, cause its good party trick, people could be impressed. no one is gonna be impressed with stinky feet.
November 28th, 2006 at 5:13 am
would the genie settle for a blow job instead?
November 28th, 2006 at 1:37 pm
Well..I was watching too many YouTube shows with visible AND stinky farts.
November 29th, 2006 at 2:12 am
Uh, because all my farts are stinky — visible or invisible they are the same to me. Now leave me alone and bring me another lover!