Here’s a list of things I will never do:
1. Sing karaoke. I don’t care how much I drink. I don’t care how much you pressure me. I don’t care if you think I’m a party pooper. I will sit there on the sidelines with Meg and smile and cheer for you when you’re up there, but I will not sing karaoke.
2. Shower at a gym in one of those communal showers. I realize that this is kinda like a trick statement, because I’d never go to a gym either. But still, those showers are gross.
3. Be in an archery contest where the bad guy get’s a bullseye, and I shoot after him and get a bullseye that splits his arrow down the middle. This one actually makes me kinda sad, but it probably won’t ever happen.
4. Pass up an opportunity to use jazz hands.
5. I will never grow my hair out long Tom Welling style. I’ve been wanting to grow out my hair for like ever. Wouldn’t I look cute?
Okay so maybe the picture above is a testament to my terrible photoshop skills, rather than the cuteness of me with long hair, but my point is still valid. My hair is extremely straight, and I’ve been wearing it spikey forever, so if I try and grow it out, it stays straight and spikey and looks like this:
See? Not so cute. I’ve tried to get past the awkward long spikey phase, but when it starts to look like the above picture, I chicken out and get it cut. Alas, I will never have shaggy hair. I guess I’ll leave the cute hair experimenting to Ryan.




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9 users responded in this post
Don’t be sad about #3 because Mythbusters proved that this was impossible anyway.
Ahh… the travails of growing your hair out. Quick tip, it’s kind of hard to tell from the pic (what, with you mad photoshop skillz and all), but it looks like you might have kinda thick hair, like me. If your cutter to take a razor and thin it out, you’ll be able to do a lot more with it as it gets longer.
Your hair is perfect. Long hair looks hideous on most guys. So please keep it the way it is.
And is there ever opportunity where you cannot use Jazz hands?
I’m so with you on the karaoke.
I recognize my limits.
If I were to attempt karaoke, it would be much like when Cameron Diaz’ charachter in “My Best Friend’s Wedding” is bullied in to singing at a packed bar, but without the charm and without winning over the entire crowd with my cuteness.
I’ve been name-checked! Thanks Craiggers!
[…] My ongoing Peter Petrelli hair experiment (see here and here) is gaining traction in the blogosphere! First, reader Brian F. recently opted to have a Hair War; and now, Craig over at Puntabulous has name-checked me as well. Yes, yes, I have a distance to go yet. I’m aware. But then again, every journey begins with a single step. […]
No karaoke, ever! Solidarity, my friend.
You’d never use the shower at the gym? Craiggers, don’t you watch porn? you know all the sex opportunities you’re missing out on?
NOT that i speak from personal experience or anything. I hate the gym, i find my random anonymous sexual encounters elsewhere.
HUGS…
Craig, your hair looks really good the way it is in most of your photos. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
Tell Me What a Dork I Am!