Puntabulous

PUNTABULOUS IS A COMPETITIVE BASTARD

So the reason my Mom found out about my blog is plain and simple. I am a competitive bastard. Let me preface this by saying that my Mom thinks the internet is the Devil. I think she’s afraid that at the tender age of 25, I am still at risk of being kidnapped by child predators. This idea may seem ridiculous at first, however, if someone pulled up and offered me candy if I drove around with them while they searched for their lost puppy dog, I’d be a goner. Mmmm…candy…

MOVING ON:

My Mom doesn’t even like the fact that I have a MySpace page. So I thought it was for the best that I not tell her about this little Puntabulous thing I had going on. When I would take pictures with Natalie Portman, my wife, I would explain that I was just sending them to my friends as a joke. Deception? My forte!

CUT TO:

My brother Adam found my blog. I’m not sure how he found it, but he did. I explained that Mom didn’t know about it, and that it might be best if she didn’t.

CUT TO:

My brother Adam started his own blog. HERE IT IS! Now I’m not sure why he did, but I can only assume that he was amazed and inspired by the wonderfulness of my blog, that he tried to emulate me by making his own. Right, Adam?

Adam, proud of his new blog, told my Mom about it. Did she go apeshit, you ask? No! She loved it! She even started leaving comments! COMMENTS! My mom, who never goes near the computer ever, and who needed me to talk her through checking her e-mail over the phone while I was away in college, and who severely questions the difference between clicking and double-clicking, was suddenly reading blogs and leaving comments!

Now don’t get me wrong, Adam’s blog is really funny. It’s a great contrast to Mommy Bloggers, but from a Dad’s perspective. But man, Mom just could not stop talking about how wonderful Adam’s blog was. “Did you read Adam’s blog today?” “Wasn’t Adam’s post funny today?” “Isn’t Adam a remarkable human being who is now my favorite child because of his amazing blog?” Okay, it didn’t go that far, but it was pretty close. Adam has the edge on me because he can blog about his children, my Mom’s grandchildren. Mom’s are suckers for grandchildren.

I held my tongue for as long as I could. It wasn’t until I posted a link to Adam’s blog and Antonio, a long-time Puntabulous reader (Hi Antonio!), made his way over to Adam’s blog and left a comment. My Mom almost died of joy. “Some guy named Antonio found Adam’s blog and left a comment! Adam’s blog is so amazing that random people find it and love it!”

I snapped. “I can’t take it anymore! I have a blog too!” I shouted. “And it’s better than Adam’s! And random people only found his because I linked to him!” My Mom was shocked. She was quiet for a second, thought to herself, and then finally said: “So you’re not just sending those pictures of you and Natalie Portman to your friends?”

So now both mine and Adam’s blogs are bookmarked on my parents computer for easy access. And the good thing is, Adam is all the way in Atlanta, so he can’t help it if I do stuff like this:

Okay, so maybe I’m a tad competitive. Sue me. Oh, and comments are back. Woo!

RANDOM | Craig | June 28, 2007 7:55 am

13 Comments

By DWQ Online, June 28, 2007 @ 8:27 am

Natalie Portman trumps grandchildren any day. I hope your mom realizes that your blog is the bestest of all blogs in the world.
By Antonio, June 28, 2007 @ 8:31 am

HA! I really hope I did not cause any family problems. By the way, I had NO idea Adam is your brother. His blog is very funny, insightful, and a great peek into family life. But yours has Natalie Portman and Super Viagra. Maybe a cross-over episode?
By blakbyrd797, June 28, 2007 @ 9:30 am

Thanks for turning me on to another funny read! Don’t worry, I won’t forget about Puntabulous. BTW, I would be horrified if my mom started reading my blog.
By Polt, June 28, 2007 @ 11:05 am

Gee, sometimes I’m really sad that I’m an only child. Had to be competative with the family dog, which really isn’t always as easy as it may seem. Nonetheless, I do like the note on the parents computer. Bet it drives Adam nuts that he can’t do anything.

But seriously…candy and a lost puppy, that’s ALL it would take? Damn, why am I just finding this out now?

HUGS…

Oh, and HI, Craig’s Mom! Look, people leave comments here too!!!
By Brian F., June 28, 2007 @ 11:26 am

I think it’s important to note that while you’ve mentioned your brother a time or two on your blog, a quick search for the name “Craig” on his blog yields nothing.

Not only is he trying to steal your blog thunder, he won’t even talk about you. He’s obviously threatened by your success and the fact that your wife regularly carries a blaster.
By Sven, June 28, 2007 @ 2:54 pm

I live in fear my mother will search for ‘Sven’s mum’ on Google. Seven letters that would write me out of the will altogether. Blogging is a dangerous game, and yet it seems so innocent. Ah well, I never liked that tea set any way.
By BOSSY, June 28, 2007 @ 3:51 pm

That was the best Screenplay Bossy ever read. And what an exciting surprise ending! She was afraid it would be one of those movies where the parents murder their children.
By Grim Reality Girl, June 28, 2007 @ 11:01 pm

Craig, THIS is exactly what I love about you — you competative bastard!!!!!
By Jack Harrison, June 28, 2007 @ 11:42 pm

Oh man, that sucks. Thats actually one of the reasons I made my blog private. I think I’d be kicked out of the house if my parents ever read mine.

BTW, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls is playing on the Fox Movie Channel right now, and its terribly terrific.
By Jimmay, June 29, 2007 @ 6:57 am

And your hotter…Thats gotta mean something haha
By Kimmy, June 29, 2007 @ 11:29 am

If you want some real dirt on Adam. Come see me! Some of his funniest moments are available to you for a small price.

WAIT! Adam is my best friend. I can’t do that to him.

Well, maybe!
By Ryan, June 29, 2007 @ 7:12 pm

It’s like Sophie’s Choice, but with blogs!
By shirley, July 1, 2007 @ 8:50 pm

ooh, can I meet your mom? she sounds so nurturing… add my blog to their bookmarks!