Aug
2
I’m coining a new term today:
THE BAD CLOWN DATE
This is what I call a really bad date. The date isn’t bad for you, it’s bad for them. Have you ever been in one of those situations where the person hits all the marks on your mental checklist for a potential suitor, but you can just tell that they’re having a terrible time? For whetever reason, the conversation never really picks up speed, or doesn’t get past that awkward question/answer phase.
Sadly, there’s not much you can do about it though. They’ve probably (mis)judged you from the moment they saw you and they are determined to have a terrible time. But you try valiantly to make them like you. Hence the term “Bad Clown”, because you’re struggling like a newbie clown at a five-year-old’s birthday party to keep all the kiddies entertained. And even though you’re not having that great of a time either (only because you’re so stressed about them not having a good time), you still tell yourself that you’re perfect for each other, and that you just need to win them over.
Moments before you jump up, wave your arms, and shout “Wacka! Wacka! Wacka!” in your best Fozzy voice, they ask if you’re ready to go. You have lost. You should be stripped of your clown nose and oversized shoes.
And just when you thought it couldn’t get any sadder, just like the Bad Clown gives the parents of the birthday boy his card for future parties, you text message the person telling them what a good time you had and hope to do it again, and don’t get a response.
The Bad Clown Date. Learn it. Love it. But really hate it.
August 2nd, 2007 at 12:31 pm
hmmm, no I can’t say I’ve ever experienced this. Perhaps it’s cause I use the arm-flapping ‘wonka, wonka, wonka’ Fozzy stuff and an opening line. Kinda weeds out all those I don’t want in the first place, ya know?
HUGS…
August 2nd, 2007 at 6:33 pm
Ah, the sting of the hanging text message. Ouch.
Shouldn’t this be the post where you lie and say you kicked HIM to the curb? Self-delusion is God’s gift to the broken-hearted.
August 2nd, 2007 at 11:17 pm
Wasn’t there anything that you didn’t like about him? I would focus on whatever that was. Remember this Craigger… You are a great guy, and he is a clown for not realizing it.
August 3rd, 2007 at 10:27 am
Eff that clown and let’s grab a bite to eat one of these days. So much gossip to fill you in on!
August 3rd, 2007 at 1:46 pm
Yeah…I’ve had that happen as well, including with people that seemed great previously at a party in which we met. It’s never quite easy to realize you’re in the position of being someone that they just aren’t in to. But as your other kind readers have indicated, you certainly seem to be a catch…and I hope that a truly wonderful guy will see you soon…maybe on the street corner waiting for a bus or cab…maybe on the subway…maybe as you pick up a coffee at a cafe…maybe just as you are walking past each other on the same sidewalk. He turns and says ‘hey’ and smiles…and everything falls into place.
August 5th, 2007 at 4:15 pm
Oh, Craig. I feel your pain. I hate the hanging text message. For me, it’s usually a hanging email. And then, I feel crankier and sadder as they time passes and I get no response. I tell myself, I didn’t really want a response to begin with! So there! But I kind of did. Dating is one big pile of suck.
August 11th, 2007 at 8:12 pm
hmmm,, I hope this wasnt me.
I think you are wonderful dork.
August 21st, 2007 at 1:51 pm
I totally had a bad clown date… With you.
Long time no see, lol.
December 13th, 2007 at 1:13 pm
i love you