Puntabulous

I can’t believe they got Sigourney Weaver to do this. She still looks amazing though. Now if only they could make her do a fifth Aliens movie.

Here are things I loved about Stardust:

1. The fact that you can have a historical fantasy movie without an “epic” battle between armies of computer generated creatures.

2. The understanding that a good swordfight can be just as exciting as an “epic” battle.

3. No impassioned speeches given atop horseback preceding the “epic” battles that did not take place, as discussed above.

4. The word “epic” not appearing anywhere in the marketing for this movie.

5. Charlie Cox.

6. Michelle Pfeiffer.

7. Every other actor who participated in the production of this movie.

8. The narration by Ian McKellen.

9. It wasn’t afraid to be silly. (Bonus points to Robert DeNiro for extra silly.)

10. The super-romantic wonderful ending.

Everyone needs to see this movie immediately. In fact, I might need to see it again.

1. Michelle Pfeiffer was honored with a Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on Monday. For those of you counting at home, here are some people who received their stars before Ms. Pfeiffer: Ryan Seacrest, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, Judge Judy, Wesley Snipes, Suzanne Somers, Britney Spears, David Spade, Paula Abdul, Godzilla, Pee-Wee Herman, Jay Leno, Chuck Norris, The Rugrats.

2. Speaking of Michelle Pfeiffer, I’m really excited about Stardust, which opens this weekend. It’s getting really good geek buzz, which is totally better than regular buzz. They’re saying it’s going to be the new Princess Bride. That’s a bold statement but I’m open to the idea.

3. If I were to purchase one version of Superman 2 on DVD, should I buy the Original or the Richard Donner Cut? Please advise.

4. Speaking of comic book movies from the 80’s, am I the only one that isn’t impressed by Jack Nicholson’s portrayal of the Joker? Everyone holds it up as the gold standard of comic book villainy. But I just see it as Jack Nicholson being Jack Nicholson. I’m interested to see what Health Ledger brings to the table.

5. I made a new banner for the top of Puntabulous. It was a picture of Scrabble letters saying “PUNTABULOUS”. But it came out really bad, and made me appreciate the banner I already have.

6. The third season of Alias isn’t nearly as bad as I was lead to believe. I’m quite enjoying it so far. I’m not missing Bradley Cooper or Merrin Dungey nearly as much as I thought I would. I am however missing Lena Olin. Sigh.

7. And finally, another awesome clip from Family Guy:

So my parents went away for the week. Monday to Friday. Yeah, I know! What’s the fun of having the house to yourself when it’s not even on the weekend? Oh well. Here’s what happened:

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Here are some things I currently hate:

1. Amy Winehouse. Seriously. What’s with the hair?

2. Homeschooling to avoid science.

3. Guys who sit with their legs spread wide open on the subway.

4. The fact that I haven’t seen Hairspray, The Simpsons, or Sunshine yet.

5. The fact that I’ve only seen Transformers once.

6. The fact that my car isn’t an ass-kicking robot.

7. Tony Hawk. Get a job!

8. Monthly reports. Stop doing work…to write about doing work.

9. Post-Harry Potter reading. It just isn’t as good!

10. Homeschooling to avoid the social stresses of public school.

11. That American Express commercial with Shaun White. Get a job!

12. Faxes.

13. The stray kitten who lives in our yard that won’t be my friend. I put out milk for you damn it!

14. That sick feeling after drinking too much water.

15. “Double Letter Score” tiles on Scrabble. Doubling a ‘T’ is hardly even worth the trouble!

16. Intelligent Design.

17. Talking on the phone. I’m an instant message kinda guy.

18. Hurting myself on obvious things (eg: playing with a staple remover).

I’m coining a new term today:

THE BAD CLOWN DATE

This is what I call a really bad date. The date isn’t bad for you, it’s bad for them. Have you ever been in one of those situations where the person hits all the marks on your mental checklist for a potential suitor, but you can just tell that they’re having a terrible time? For whetever reason, the conversation never really picks up speed, or doesn’t get past that awkward question/answer phase.

Sadly, there’s not much you can do about it though. They’ve probably (mis)judged you from the moment they saw you and they are determined to have a terrible time. But you try valiantly to make them like you. Hence the term “Bad Clown”, because you’re struggling like a newbie clown at a five-year-old’s birthday party to keep all the kiddies entertained. And even though you’re not having that great of a time either (only because you’re so stressed about them not having a good time), you still tell yourself that you’re perfect for each other, and that you just need to win them over.

Moments before you jump up, wave your arms, and shout “Wacka! Wacka! Wacka!” in your best Fozzy voice, they ask if you’re ready to go. You have lost. You should be stripped of your clown nose and oversized shoes.

And just when you thought it couldn’t get any sadder, just like the Bad Clown gives the parents of the birthday boy his card for future parties, you text message the person telling them what a good time you had and hope to do it again, and don’t get a response.

The Bad Clown Date. Learn it. Love it. But really hate it.

Two boring site-related items today:

1. If you tried to e-mail me about Harry Potter 7, and the e-mail bounced back to you, I fixed the e-mail link in my “About Me” section, so try again. I’d love to exchange thoughts!

2. If you try commenting, and it doesn’t show up, let me know, because it probably got caught by my spam filter, and I get way too much spam to look through it all before deleting, so let me know so I can let my spam filter know that you are a real person, and not someone trying to sell me penis enlargement pills.