Nov
26
I decorated the house over the weekend. I’m pretty sure Al Gore and Scott are gonna come kick my ass. But they’re L.E.D. lights so they save energy! But I think the amount of them cancels out any energy saving impact that may have occurred.
Here’s a closer look of the package on the roof. Go ahead, you can say it. My package is huge. Wink. And I made it out of regular strings of lights! I am awesome! As is my package. Double wink. I was totally Spiderman on the roof putting those lights up. Without the super crappy movies though. Seriously, those movies are so bad they make me angry.
How angry are you?!
I’m so angry, I manage to bring up my anger about the Spiderman movies in a post about Christmas decorations! Does my fury know no bounds? Apparently not! Sorry folks, I was out Christmas shopping and I saw all the Spiderman 3 DVDs littering the shelves. Okay, focus Craig, happy place. Three, two, one, one, two, three, what the heck is bothering me?
I’m such a sucker for Christmas decorations. The earlier the better. Squeal!
Okay, but seriously, the Spiderman movies sucked huge amounts of ass. The first one was the biggest piece of crap I’ve ever seen in my life. The Green Goblin was the least threatening comic book movie villain since the penguins with bombs strapped to their backs in Batman Returns. The second one was better, but still meh. The third one had a dance sequence. Ugh.
November 26th, 2007 at 7:12 am
But… but… the third one *had a dance sequence* … which was my favorite part. Because in my fantasy world, if I get infected by an evil alien symbiote that gives me super powers and emo hair, you bet your ass that the first thing I’m gonna do is find an ex who broke my heart and do a little “look what you’re not getting” dance.
November 26th, 2007 at 9:04 am
Wow. . . I’m at a loss
November 26th, 2007 at 9:14 am
Ha, I love the Carl Winslow method of calming down there.
and yes, I saw like 5 minutes of Spiderman 1 and knew that it was a giant waste of time.
November 26th, 2007 at 10:27 am
Spiderman 3 had a dance sequence?
Maybe I will see it after all.
November 26th, 2007 at 10:49 am
Go cuddle with Felice, Craiggers, everything will be okay…
I mean, it’s only Spider-Man, it’s not like the screwed an important comic book movie, like X3…or the second FF…..horrible….
HUGS…
November 26th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
Christmas lights are *always* forgiven sweetie!
November 26th, 2007 at 1:42 pm
I dunno… if you ask me, there aren’t enough lights on that house by half! It’s one of my few redneck qualities I guess, but that house should be seen from space in my opinion. heh.
November 26th, 2007 at 2:29 pm
Yes, your package is well hung. Quite.
November 26th, 2007 at 3:10 pm
i do like a guy with a nice big package.
November 26th, 2007 at 7:15 pm
Yes, a big package is always nice.
Anyway, I actually like your christmas lights a lot
November 26th, 2007 at 7:31 pm
Love the lights! i did the exact same thing this weekend… but I didn’t light up my package for the neighbors..
November 26th, 2007 at 9:45 pm
I liked the Spiderman movies. (not a comic book geek though) Well, 1 and 2, 3 made me giggle. I mean really. “Bad Peter” (sounds like the name of a porn movie…) just made me giggle.
November 26th, 2007 at 11:28 pm
ech, sorry, Craig,this is awful. Christmas lights. Not good.
November 27th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
So, is there a line to unwrap your package?
November 27th, 2007 at 10:41 pm
I think there should be a category about Craig’s package. Also, I’m anti Christmas before Halloween! That’s just wrong!
November 28th, 2007 at 1:50 pm
your blog is FUNNY!
i got ulcers after seeing spiderman; i grew particularly angry with James Franco’s twinkley/crinkley eyes…grrr
November 29th, 2007 at 10:32 am
Your package is awesome!!!
November 29th, 2007 at 10:40 am
I remember making your package that big one night.