Dec
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Harry Potter - 2 - We liked the first two when we first saw them, but that’s because we didn’t know how genius they would later become in more capable hands. So Chamber of Secrets gets my vote for not having the magical feel of the first film and a plot that put Hermione out of the action. That’s never a good thing!
Back to the Future - 2 - I still don’t understand what the hell happened during this movie. Plus I have a special place in my heart for the third one. Giddy Up!
Aliens - 3 - Even though the forth one has that god-awful newborn hybrid alien at the end, it still has some pretty sweet (frickin sweet!) action scenes. As for the third one, I still haven’t forgiven them for killing Newt and Hicks. And who’s idea was it to only have one alien in the entire movie?
Jaws - 4 - What’s the point in describing why it’s the worst of the bunch when this scene does it so well. A boat full of white people and the shark comes almost entirely out of the water to eat the black guy.
Star Trek - 1 - The Voyager concept was pretty genius, but boooooooooring. And yes, Number 5: The Final Frontier was a good movie!
Star Wars - 4 - This number is referring to the fourth one made, meaning The Phantom Menace. Anakin should have been older. Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon should have reversed ages. Qui-Gon (the apprentice) should have been the rogue-ish, Han Solo-esque character so desperately missing from the prequel movies. Then Qui-Gon should have been killed by Darth Maul, which would make Obi-Wan more anxious to train Anakin against the council’s wishes in order to prove himself as a teacher and make up for his failure to protect Qui-Gon.
The Matrix - 2 - These movies makes me sad. At least the 2nd one was so awful that anything would have been better and the 3rd one was a step up.
Pirates of the Caribbean - 3 - These movies make me really sad. The first one was amazing! The 2nd one was bad, but could have just been build up to a spectacular third one. It didn’t. Remember when Naomi Harris was turning into her sea-goddess form and turned into… a REALLY BIG Naomi Harris. Really guys? That’s the best you could do?
Spiderman - 1 - Two words: Green Goblin.
Superman - 4 - Wait, nuclear weapons are bad? Could you explain that to me again?
X-Men - 3 - Good action, but missed the depth of the first two. And more missed opportunitues than you can shake a stick at. SIDENOTE
Batman - 4 - Mr. Feeze could have been such an interesting character. Instead we got Arnold Schwarzenegger and Batman and Robin with ice skates that popped out of their boots.
Indiana Jones - 2 - Congratulations Mr. Spielberg for tapping that, but Kate Capshaw was the most annoying love interest of any movie ever. And anyone who decides to add a kid to a movie where no kid belongs should be shot.
Jurassic Park - 3 - Even though The Lost World is pretty bad too, at least it had the large scale befitting a Jurassic Park movie. Jurassic Park 3 could have taken place in my back yard and had that awful Spinosaurus. Also, a plane full of white people and the Spinosaurus eats the black guy:
Lord of the Rings - 1 - Too much Frodo. Elijah Wood is the worst thing about this series. Remember when the Troll stabbed Frodo in Moria and he “died” for about twenty minutes? Ugh. He did the same thing in Shelob’s cave too. Man does he love to milk a good “death” scene.
Series I’ve never seen every movie of: The Godfather Trilogy (I never saw any of them), the Terminator Series (I never saw the first one, but I love the 2nd and 3rd ones), the Die Hard movies (I never saw the 2nd and 4th ones), the Shrek movies (I never saw the 3rd one), and the Rush Hour movies (I never saw the 2nd or 3rd ones).

December 18th, 2007 at 8:50 am
I agree with just about everything you said. Two exceptions are Star Trek 5 and The Lost World are definitely the worst movies in their respective series. And just a head’s up, The Godfather 3 is so so very bad that it will actually cancel out any good feelings that you may have for the other two Godfather movies. It was actaully about 2 years later when I was able to put #3 out of my head and sit and enjoy Godfather 1 and 2 again.
The problem with Back to the Future 2 is that it was a transition movie between #1 and #3 which were both great. They could have cut out that whole piece about Biff steeling the sports book, becoming megga-rich and of course, who can forget Marty’s mother’s boob-job. Then just tacked on a little transition material on the end of 1 and the beginning of 3 (which would really then be the second movie) and eliminate 2 altogether. But really the worst part about #2 was how long we waited between #1 and #2 and how dissappointed we were with #2. Not nearly as long (or as dissappointing) as the Star Wars prequels. But I remember the great big “TO BE CONTINUED” at the end of the first movie then waiting the rest of my teenage years for #2.
Just my thoughts…
December 18th, 2007 at 9:54 am
Shrek 3 definately the stinker in the pack… #2 had the gloriousness of Jennifer Saunders from AbFab.
December 18th, 2007 at 10:01 am
There was a THIRD Jurassic Park movie? There shouldn’t have been a second. I think POTC 2 was the worst of all, just for that stupid non-ending. I screamed for about a day after watching that.
December 18th, 2007 at 10:40 am
Honestly, I enjoyed Jurassic Park 3 much more than 2 just because of that god awful Trex ending on 2.
I choose to just think of The Matrix as a stand alone movie. The other two do not exist in my world.
Alien 3 gets a bad wrap. It is certainly different than the other two, but if you look at it as a work by David Fincher, then it certainly fits well in his work. I would never place it before 4. Winona Ryder folks…
I actually consider Harry Potter 1 and 2 to be the worst of the series, but there is just something about Chamber of Secrets that I like more. Maybe it is because the climactic battle is a lot better .
As for LOTR, I think The Two Towers is by far the worst, mainly because that is my least favorite book of the trilogy. Plus, I kind of feel like the muffed the Ents. I really enjoy the first, especially the extended edition, because it just sets up everything so well.
Ah well…I wrote too much!
December 18th, 2007 at 11:15 am
The way you just rerwrote The Phantom Menace completely changed the series :p
December 18th, 2007 at 11:51 am
zomg, please go back in time and change The Phantom Menace. Husband has active nerd-guy gene that requires watching these series once every 2-3 years, so you will save me from many.many torturous hours. Made more-so now that I have read your edit changes and realize what it could have been.
Also, when you got back, you could sell your adventure as the script to Back to the Future 4 and possibly redeem that series as well.
December 18th, 2007 at 12:52 pm
Hold up now. Did you just say that Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom sucked? Are you indicating also that you did not appreciate the addition of Short Round? Blasphemy.
December 18th, 2007 at 12:57 pm
Ahem, there was a second alien in Alien 3, it just didn’t pop out until the end… I quite liked the third film’s bleak tone, the fact that the alien had some traits of its canine host - and who needs a bunch of aliens when one is enough to decimate all those convicts? I’d like to see a remake with Wentworth Miller though
As for the rest - spot on!
December 18th, 2007 at 1:08 pm
WHAT?! The Temple of Doom sucked?!
Totally dumbfounded. Shocked. Speechless!
I don’t think I can support you for the gay bloggies.
December 18th, 2007 at 1:11 pm
Shrek 3 sucked. They should have quit while they were ahead. And, stop trying to milk Christmas with the stupid Shrek special.
December 18th, 2007 at 1:37 pm
I think that of this entire list, I’ve only seen 7 of the entire series…but that’s not the point of the comment. If you don’t like Frodo, don’t read the books because pretty much half of each book is dedicated solely to him. It’s a bit much, overwhelming, and well, boring. I just wanted to warn you…
And you didn’t mention Uma Thurman in Batman and Robin…thoughts on her? She made the movie pretty bearable for me, I liked her.
December 18th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
To answer a sidenote of yours. Some people believe that the phase “shake a stick at” comes from when farmers would count animals in a coral and use a stick to point at them. So there for more than you would shake a stick at, meaning a lot of something.
Now another thought is that people would shate a stick or a sword, Sabre rattling, in defiance of an enemy. If the person wasn’t worth fight then he was nothing to shake a stick at.
I hope that helps.
god I am a nerd. lol
December 18th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
pirates 3 sucked. i watched it with my roommate michele. and after the first hour we were like…theres 2 more!?!?!
December 18th, 2007 at 4:28 pm
Wait.
Excuse me?
You’ve never seen ANY of The Godfather movies? Cancel your weekend plans and rent them. All of them. (although admittedly the first one is the best one)
Go. Now. Thank me later.
December 18th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
pirates 3 was the best tied up all the loose ends beast film of the year star trek 1 the stars said thay got it wrong on that one and got it right on the rest and back to the future 2 you just need some lessons on time travel
December 18th, 2007 at 5:04 pm
You haven’t seen the Godfather movies? You’ve got to be kidding me… We’ll bring it with us for Christmas.
I’m going to pretty much agree with you on everything, with the exception of Temple of Doom - it’s Harrison Ford, for cryin’ out loud! The love interest sucked, but that’s about the worst part.
As for Rush Hour 3, I’m withholding judgement since I haven’t seen it yet. Thank heavens for DVDs!
HUGS!!
December 18th, 2007 at 6:40 pm
Back To The Future 3, Star Trek 5, pretty much all 3 Star Wars prequels, and the Matrix 3 were the worst of thier series. I agree with everything else you’ve written.
Carry on, then.
HUGS…
December 18th, 2007 at 10:30 pm
matrix!!! I have to like matrix 2 juz because I like matrix one too much…
December 19th, 2007 at 12:39 am
I agree with you about the Pirates series. I loved #1. I even liked #2. I thought #3 was horrible.
By the middle of the movie I wasn’t sure what the hell was going on, and I think it lost the fun feel of the first movie. Too dark for me.
I love the Alien movies. All of them. ALL OF THEM. Sigourney Weaver!!! (I don’t count the AvP movies as “Alien” movies, btw.)
Temple of Doom was my favorite Indiana Jones movie.
December 19th, 2007 at 2:10 am
A lack of Nazis. That’s what really made Indiana Jones 2 suffer.
December 19th, 2007 at 3:08 am
I’ve been a lurker/reader/voter but have never left a comment, so here goes.
I agree Harry Potter 1&2 were not the best movies, that Chris Columbus and his screaming “mouth hands” was just too pat and toootooooo passe.My Favs in the series go 3,5,4 then 1&2 switch places. The darkness and hope of Azkhaban just cinematically appeal to me. I’ve read all the books and really look forward to the other 2 movies.
And my LOTR movies go 1,3&2. Fellowship to me was pretty much the perfect movie. I hadn’t read the books before I saw it, but after seeing it once, I read all three books and then saw Fellowship 2 more times in the theater, and I read all three books a second time. As a whole, I think the three movies are probably the most true and honest adaptation of a book you could ever hope for. I’m not gonna go all geeky/nerdy here and spell out why, if I wanted to do that, I’d get my own blog. Just trust me when I say I’m more well read than most people…..and I realize this would be the perfect time for me to tell you to increase your vocab for your NY resolution. I have been reading you, just not commenting.
And on the rest of your list, I’ve seen parts of all the series you’ve commented on, but don’t feel well enough versed to opine.
So, hi, and good luck with the GayBloggies. And Happy Holidays. And I’ll shut up now.
Dee
December 19th, 2007 at 11:00 am
You should definitely check out the Godfather movies, and Terminator 1. And Die Hard 4.
What about Rocky? Rambo? Bourne? Bond? Ocean’s?
December 20th, 2007 at 3:31 pm
I am giving a shout out to Rocky! I feel he was left out.
December 21st, 2007 at 9:38 am
Very funny and I agree with you about everything except Chamber of Secrets (Kenneth Branagh! Remains my fave HP character) and Fellowship (Sean Bean as Boromir the rest aren’t the same without him).
Definitely check out Terminator 1. Die Hard 4 is fun in an over the top Transporter 2 type way (Transporter 1 is better). DH2 too gross & repetitive. Shrek 3 doesn’t live up to the first two but I’m looking forward to seeing Puss in his own movie!
January 5th, 2008 at 3:58 am
I am conflicted on Temple of Doom. I agree with Emily that to dislike it is blasphemy, but if you’re just *comparing* them… I dunno. I think Temple of Doom might still be my favorite. And how can you not like Short Round?