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Embrace Your Inner Foot Fetishist

We interupt our regularly scheduled lunacy for some other complete lunacy. My sister and her friends always compete with each other over who has the nicest feet. When she told me this, I told her that my friend from work is always talking about how cute she thinks her feet are. So I offered up my huge audience to finally settle this debate. I leave it up to you, dear readers: Below there are anonymous pictures of my sister’s, three of her friends’, and my friend’s feet. Who has the nicest? Leave your pick in the comment section, and feel free to elaborate on why you made your choice.

UPDATE: The feet have been moved to a safer place after the jump to get them off my front page. You can still vote though! I’ll announce the winner this weekend.

A:

B:

C (the only male in the group, not me!):

D:

E:

Leave your pick (A-E) in the comment section! Thanks for playing! No more feet, I promise!

70 Responses to “Embrace Your Inner Foot Fetishist”

  1. cortney says:

    i think i would have to go with either D or E - i’m having a hard time deciding between the two (because my feet look exactly like D’s!!). but i also think E’s are cute, in a sporty/hippie sort of way. I’d say it’s E over D, 55/45.

  2. andrew j says:

    This is bad, but I have to say “C”. The other 4 look weird to me. Maybe it’s just the top view. “A” and “B” have really lovely nails.

  3. Dave S. says:

    Okay, first off: Feet are gross. Is there such a thing as an anti-fetish? Because that would be me when it comes to feet.

    Having said that, I gotta go with C. Regardless of whether they’re male or female — viewing them as an artist — they have the best shape.

  4. Maggie says:

    Feet totally gross me out. But since you asked, I will sacrifice and pick anyway. I pick A - I think because all the others have super long toes that look a little monkey like (no offense to the feet owners)

  5. Hayden says:

    I must say that I hope this is the beginning of judging female body parts. Please continue this trend! Until we get to the good parts I’ll deal with this post…
    A-not even close, looks like a stump with 5 little toes on it
    B-No way, these nails are way too long and the toes are flying all over the place
    C-Terrible picture, probably because the person knows she has no chance of winning and didn’t want to show her true disfigured feet
    D-like the nail color, love the toe ring, looking good, wouldn’t kick this out of bed in the morning…
    E-wins for me, love the french tips and soft looking foot. This looks like the foot of a girl that knows how to take care of herself and that leads me to believe she is a soft skinned, blonde little hottie…please show us the whole package!

  6. David says:

    My gay eye goes immediately for the natural and masculine looking feet of C. But after that, either D or E would be my next choice.

  7. Dave S. says:

    David: Do you only have one eye or only one that’s gay? (Which might actually be okay — these women may well only have one foot…)

    And I agree with you — there’s something to be said about going au natural. Love women with painted fingernails, but not so much painted toenails.

  8. David from Brazil says:

    Feet are what separates you from dirt, mud, and all the crap that’s laying on the ground. I mean, they’re like the frontier patrolman of yuckiness. So i’m with Dave S on this one. Ew. Having said that, I can’t resist giving my (un)solicited opinion on any matters far and wide, so erhmm. E. Of course a man’s foot would be the logical choice, but I feel I would be cheating the whole purpose of this thing. Oh damn it. C. Can’t resist it, it’s in my genes or whatever. C it is. Just for the promise of something nice attached to it (I hope).

  9. Ξ_Heather says:

    I like C, because they look the most natural.

    Otherwise, I’d vote for a mix of E and D — E’s nails with D’s polish job and toe ring.

    Feet look really weird when you look at them. Who thought them up, anyway?

  10. jason says:

    The toe ring says plenty, i bet she is a wild one when it comes to the fun dept if you know what i mean…

  11. john says:

    Feet are gross.

    I’m picking C for the same reason as Dave S. they appear to have the best shape. I think that may be due to their position in the photo.

    I will say that at least none of them appear to be dancers, none of them appear to have jacked up dancer toes.

  12. Matt says:

    The first foot is awfully red, looks like a lobster foot that just got boiled. I like D the best.

  13. Alex says:

    I’m going with D though C doesn’t seem that bad either.

  14. Mark says:

    E’s foot is the most attractive overall, but I gotta go with C cuz his second toe is longer than his first, just like mine.

  15. Nicky says:

    Ideally, I try not to look at feet at all. But because you asked, I’ll go with

    E

  16. lisa says:

    I hate feet. Especially ones with long toe nails..the kind that you can widdle wood with. I also hate butter toes, like the male foot. I vote for E!

  17. erika says:

    LOVE E! looks like my feet. i used to get prank calls that said “you have sexy feet!”

  18. ExAstrisScientia says:

    I don’t like feet!!!!

    Keep your boots on in bed, don’t worry I can touch up the paint on the ceiling :-P

  19. Dave S. says:

    Umm…butter toes? What’s a butter toe?

  20. Meeeee says:

    Okay, generally speaking feet give me the willies. I don’t like feet, don’t find them attractive and certainly not sexy. They serve a purpose, to get you from A to B. But If forced to choose I would say E as they seem to be the most benign, nothing really grossed me out about them.

  21. Sue says:

    Don’t you ever do this to us again, Craig.

  22. Craig says:

    Gay Guys: Stop picking C just because they are boy feet. Homos!

    ExAstrisScientia: Scandalous!

    Dave S: I have no idea.

    Sue: LOL

  23. Kimi says:

    B for sure. I can’t believe people out there talk about how cute their feet are. Everyone I know (including myself) hates their feet. I’m glad someone out there enjoys their own feet.

  24. Kári Emil says:

    E but maybe C. It is my opinion, though, that C should be disqualified for an unsatisfactory view of the whole feet.

  25. miraty says:

    D. Nice polish job. Good overall shape.

    Mens feet are NEVER cute.

    E. Don’t tell the owner of foot E but those last two toes being way shorter, that’s different…..Nice nails though.

  26. ScottieC says:

    Gotta be E. Her foot looks really soft and delicate.

  27. booboo1 says:

    I’m going to throw my vote at E, but only because it doesn’t look as weird as the rest. I’d also like to see whose C’s feet are attached to…..

  28. Jere says:

    I have ugly, ugly feet. My toes are way too long. On the plus side, if I ever lose a finger, they could replace it with one of my toes and I suspect nobody would ever be able to tell the difference.

    Sorry, Craig, I can’t buck the gay boys picking C trend. They are nice feet, as feet go.

  29. uh what? says:

    Hands down it’s E. Or feet down. Whatever.

  30. Angel says:

    Definitely not A (they look like my feet, and I hate my feet). Nor C because I can barely see them, though they do look fairly nice for a guy’s feet. D is out because there’s a bit of a tinger situation going on, though she does have nice feet, I guess, if you’re into that kind of thing. So that leaves it with B and E. B’s nails look a little odd (too long?), and so I’m going to have to go with E. I would be proud to have E’s feet at the end of my legs. And our toenails are painted almost the same color, which makes me like her automatically.

  31. Hayden says:

    Angel, I am with you but I have to say that I would be proud of having E’s feet at the end of my bed! Good morning honey!

  32. john says:

    Are butter toes like “butter face”?

    “Everything looks good butter (but her) face./Everything looks good butter toes?”

  33. Craig says:

    john: That would be my guess. Lisa, come back and explain what butter toes are please!

  34. Zee Brat says:

    E! Not like the tv station.

  35. jcann says:

    I go with D all the way.. french manicures are so unoriginal..go with a fun summer color!

  36. jcann says:

    Look how out of proportion the big toe is on E!!!

  37. Jenna says:

    Def D!! really pretty feet!

  38. Procrastamom says:

    Yuck! Ew! Gag!

    I pick C - but I didn’t like any of them. God, why did I read this right before lunch?

  39. Rachael says:

    A all the way. Course my feet look like A, so…

  40. nick says:

    C

    lol

  41. Craig says:

    Procrastamom: That isn’t exactly what I would call “embracing your inner foot fetishist”.

  42. Dave S. says:

    Craig: Maybe Procrastamom’s fetishist just isn’t inner.

    (Hey, don’t groan like that — this is *Pun*tabulous…)

  43. timmy p says:

    E all the way!!!

    WOO WOO!!! I LOVE ‘E’!! (ok that sounds weird..)

  44. Tony P says:

    I have to go with E, and I can’t believe I’m doing this.

    Yes you are a dork, but then so am I. Except I’m a social justice/political/technical dork.

  45. mandee says:

    E all the way!!! but if we were voting on best CANKLE then i would have to say C

  46. Ryan says:

    C because it reminded me least of a deformed hand. This is more a comment on the photography than any inherent quality of the feet.

  47. Nicky says:

    Haha. I’m gay and didn’t pick C!

  48. vuboq says:

    There is no such thing as cute feet. There are repulsive feet and less repulsive feet. I’d pick C, but Craig already chastised teh gayz for picking the boy, so I’ll go with E as VUBOQ’s Least Repulsive Feet for the Day! *w00t*

  49. Chris says:

    I pick E. I am hardly an expert as I don’t generally pay much attention to lady feet. The others look like their footwear just came off and are still suffering from residual shoe/sandal stress. I might have picked C if the photo were better. You really should have separate gender categories for foot evaluation if you want to transcend our various Kinsey Scale biases.

  50. Mikey says:

    E. Hands down.

    Although, man’s feet come in a close second.

  51. Derek says:

    Feet are gross, no one wins.

  52. ChickyMama says:

    I’m liking “E” the best. But since I’m related to her, this is just too damn weird!

  53. Ryan says:

    I found A to be second least repulsive.

  54. Evolving says:

    I like E, because it’s a nice natural foot. Foot are all weird looking. I don’t understand that fetish AT ALL.

  55. Barbara says:

    My vote goes to me…but noone told me about this contest!!! So if I must my vote is for…….ummmmmm……E

  56. Polt says:

    I like C the best, cause it looks more natural. Feet are gross enough without throwing paint and rings and all kinds of crap on them as well.

    HUGS..

  57. Sarahbee says:

    C

  58. lwassr says:

    OK-FIrst of all–upon further inspection of the red toenails,I believe D, if you look close enough the polish is receding from the cuticle–GROSS. just because there are not any white trash chips does not mean it isnt time for a pedi…and BUTTER TOES are in the shape of those butter knives you get at parties are with the bread basket, but, while i am no foot expert, I do believe only the big toe can be the butter toe..i like the other thought on the phrase though.

  59. mandee says:

    sarahbee… no explaination for your vote?? is it b/c you were told to vote c? or are you embarrassed by your vote?? or my fav… are you a closet lesbian and are afraid that a vote for a female foot would expose your true preference??? either way… we all know you wanted to put E

  60. Michael says:

    A all the way. Where are the hott boys feet tho? I know you have a few pictures….

  61. Ray Ray says:

    The male feet are the nicest. ‘Nuff said.

  62. BobFootnut says:

    Definately “D”. Painted toes and toe rings are hot

  63. Nemo says:

    OK I have to go with E even though I think my feet are nicer than all of them. I guess we’ll never know. Sigh!!!

  64. Bon Don says:

    D!! you can’t go wrong with red polish!

  65. Mike says:

    FEETS IS YUCKY! All I could think about when someone said “butter toes” was that lamisil commercial with the nail fungus…EWWWW

  66. Ianim says:

    How can I say I enjoy this post without sounding like I want to have their toes in my mouth all at once?

    E.

  67. Colleen says:

    E’s feet is a beauty!

  68. Chris says:

    E by a landslide!! Best overall size and shape!!! Even with the french pedicure.

  69. brad says:

    man, it’s wierd looking at feet. they all look wierder and wierder the more i look at them. But I say E, “hands down!”

  70. Puntabulous » Post Topic » And the winner is… says:

    […] the winner of the foot competition […]

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