You know what Kenley needs?

September 25, 2008
By

And no, not a smack across the face with the heavy hand of shut the eff up. (Though that might help.) Instead of being on Project Runway, she needs to be a contestant on America’s Next Top Model. I’m not saying this because seeing her in that pop outfit last night made me realize how gorgeous she is. Though I will admit she’s cute. But she needs to be on America’s Next Top Model because there is no way in hell Tyra would let her continuously get away with talking back to the judges week after week. Tyra would have put a stop to that immediately with her mama bear ways. “You need to listen. We’re trying to help you.” And next week if Kenley kept it up, she would be booted, just like our poor misguided Nikeysha. (Although I think Nikeysha was eliminated just in time for makeovers, because seriously, what would you have done with that hair?) Oh imagine if Janice Dickinson were still a judge while Kenley was a hypothetical smack-talking contestant? Sigh. A boy can dream.

Comment (90) on this Entry

90 Responses to You know what Kenley needs?

  1. Bernd on September 25, 2008 at 10:06 pm

    Michelle. he only wants to take Andre to Red Lobster. You’d get the chiffon question already in the workroom. Carry on & make it work.

    Craig, yep, he is dorky smart, but I supply the RAM in the relationship. You have no idea how much trivia is up there. I’m also his common sense, sense of direction, sense of style. So it all evens out.

  2. Michelle M. on September 25, 2008 at 10:23 pm

    Bernd: You have dashed my dreams of caucusing with Tim. Oh, the consternation and Sturm und Drang!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uP7zGF6orAI&feature=related

  3. Byl on September 26, 2008 at 2:18 am

    If I ever made Tim Gunn mad at me, I would disintegrate right there on the spot. I couldn’t do it! I’d be that ashamed. That said, thank god almighty Suede is gone for good.

  4. Zee Brat on September 26, 2008 at 6:22 am

    With any luck. Tyra will be the guest judge on the next episode. Barring that, Kenley will get kicked off in the next episode and still have to do the reunion special. She will accuse people of not understanding her genius, and someone might hit her. It’ll be awesome.

  5. Dave S. on September 26, 2008 at 6:41 am

    Sheesh. The things that are said at Puntabulous after-hours…

  6. Nicky on September 26, 2008 at 7:45 am

    Is anyone else THRILLED that Jennifer Lopez canceled her appearance as the guest judge on the finale?!
    I am NOT a fan at all and was so pleased to hear she dropped out.

    Mark: I sometimes think that anyone can love anyone else. I feel like people are sexually attracted to a certain sex, but are emotionally available to all. So loving a girl is possible for a gay man, but since sex is usually a key piece to a relationship, it wouldn’t work out. Nah mean?

    OH! And the new Britney single “Womanizer” is out now!! GO LISTEN EVERYONE!!

  7. polt on September 26, 2008 at 8:36 am

    Mark, what gay man worth his pink triangle ISN’T in love with Miss Shirley Bassey. I get goosebumps STILL upon hearing Goldfinger……

    HUGS…

  8. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 8:42 am

    Um, who is Miss Shirley Bassey?

  9. polt on September 26, 2008 at 9:32 am

    Oh my sweet LORD, Craiggers!!! Are you really sure you’re gay?

    Miss Shirely Bassey! For cripes sake, go to youtube and search for shirley bassey. Check for her rendition, the difinitive one of Goldfinger, but listen to her belt out a couple other standards.

    Who is Shirley Bassey…..*SIGH*….I weep for the youth of your gay culture. :)

    HUGS….

  10. GoKitty on September 26, 2008 at 9:45 am

    I’ve heard the name Shirley Bassey but I dont know who that is either…

  11. Dave S. on September 26, 2008 at 10:30 am

    Likewise, Craig & GoKitty. I took a look at Mark’s link, but I still have no idea…

  12. Dave S. on September 26, 2008 at 10:32 am

    But I *do* know who Shirley Jones is. Does that make up for it?

  13. Nicky on September 26, 2008 at 10:32 am

    Ummm Shirley Bassey?! You mean Britney Spears?! Sorry, the gays love HER now, not that random woman that no one’s ever heard of

  14. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 10:38 am

    Yay Britney!

  15. Dave S. on September 26, 2008 at 10:44 am

    Who’s this Britney person…?

  16. john on September 26, 2008 at 1:26 pm

    The three of you (Craig, Nicky and Dave S. GoKitty gets dispensation for at least recognizing the name) haven’t heard of Shirley Bassey? As Polt said, she sang the theme to Goldfinger! A James Bond movie!

    Wait..

    You do know who James Bond is, right?

  17. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 1:48 pm

    Okay okay, I know the theme to Goldfinger. But I only saw it for the first time just recently and I didn’t know what the name of the singer was. She reminded me of Eartha Kitt.

    “Gooooooldfiiingeeer! He’s the man, the man with the midas touch! A spider’s touch. Such a cold finger. Beckons you to enter his web of sin But don’t go in!”

  18. Nicky on September 26, 2008 at 2:19 pm

    Goldfinger?! What song is this?! You mean “Womanizer”?!

    “You’re a womanizer! Oh! Womanizer, oh, you’re womanizer baby! You you you ah. You you you ah. Womanizer x 3! Boy don’t try to front I-I know j-just what you a-a-are!”

  19. john on September 26, 2008 at 3:30 pm

    Craig: OK, you are safe. I’m also impressed that you didn’t make a Daniel Craig is the hottest Bond ever comment. (As a side, a friend of mine and his mother were watching Casino Royale and when Craig came out of the water in his little square cut bathing suit his mother was heard to utter “Ooooo!” to which my friend said “What?” and she responded with “Look how blue the water is…”)

    Nicky, Nicky, Nicky, there is more to life than Britney. I will say this, I haven’t heard the song yet, so I can’t comment on its quality or lack there of.

  20. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 4:02 pm

    Thanks a lot you freaking bastards! I haven’t stopped singing “Goooooldfiiiiingeeeer!” in my head all day. Idiots.

  21. john on September 26, 2008 at 4:22 pm

    And you are our king.

    I have one earworm that gets stuck every once in a while, but I am loathe to say it in the event it will act as a trigger.

  22. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 4:24 pm

    Say it!

    “Goooooldfiiiiingeeeer!”

  23. john on September 26, 2008 at 4:26 pm

    “Gooooooooldfiiiiiingeeeer!”

    But that ain’t it (thankfully). It is worse though. It’s a Wham song…

  24. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 4:32 pm

    “Wake me up before you go-go! Don’t leave me hanging on like a yo-yo!”

  25. john on September 26, 2008 at 4:38 pm

    That’s it. Dude, I swear, sometimes it only takes hearing “Jitterbug” and it is in my head like Charlie would like to be in Marcus.

  26. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 4:39 pm

    “In my head like Charlie would like to be in Marcus.”

    That was fantastic.

  27. Bernd on September 26, 2008 at 5:42 pm

    Who’s using Shirley Bassey’s name in vain here? She’s done 3 James Bond title songs: Goldfinger, Diamonds are forever and Moonraker. The young ones should listen to ‘history repeating’ by the Propellerheads feat. Shirley Bassey to get some access to her. There are also cool dance-versions of ‘Lovestory (Where do I begin)’.

  28. Mark on September 26, 2008 at 6:13 pm

    To everyone that doesn’t know who Dame Shirley Bassey is…..You must be related to this chick.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww

  29. Polt on September 26, 2008 at 6:33 pm

    AH YES! History Repeating! LOVE it! Good job Bernd!

    All this talk of Britney makes me ashamed to be a gay man. I know she’s a gay icon to the young..I’ve not idea why. I mean, if she were a gay icon because of her crude drunken white trash side….like say the way Patsy and Edina are, well that’s okay. But to be a gay icon because of her…..*SHUDDER* music. Oh how horrid.

    Dead gay men the world over are rolling in their graves. Is Britney really the reason they went out that hot steamy night in the late 60′s, in the high heels and buffants and took on the NY City cops??? Is that REALLY all we’ve been fighting for????

    Jeez, get me offa this soapbox and get me a cosmo….I need to take a break…

    HUGS…

  30. Nicky on September 26, 2008 at 6:59 pm

    Polt: …… we are never speaking again >: O

  31. Polt on September 26, 2008 at 7:27 pm

    Nicky….*SIGH*, Nicky, Nicky, Nicky…..trust me when i say this son, you’ll grow out of it. One day you’ll wake up, look at your Britney CD’s, and say to yourself, “What the HELL was I thinking?”

    HUGS….

  32. Bernd on September 26, 2008 at 7:40 pm

    Hey Polt, stop trashing Britney, she managed to do that by herself pretty expertly. Say what you will about her music, she has some great songs (Hit me 1 more time or Toxic come to mind) and her stuff is immensely danceable.

    The Stonewall-fighters also did not intend for young gay men to do crystal meth, rot their innards and f..k their brains out. Dancing to Britney seems positively benign by comparison. So untangle your panties before you get up on your box again. Send me one of those Cosmos please.

  33. Mark on September 26, 2008 at 8:07 pm

    Bernd: “do crystal meth, rot their innards and f..k their brains out”, isn’t that the definition Britney?

  34. Nicky on September 26, 2008 at 8:40 pm

    *adds Mark to my blacklist*

  35. Polt on September 26, 2008 at 10:32 pm

    Off the Britney topic….I just gotta wonder why it is Dave S. and I take time to do a well though out, well written post on Project Runway each Wednesday night….and we get 2 comments. Craiggers mentions it in passing and gets over 80.

    *SIGH*….I guess if we were as cute as Craiggers we might ger more comments.

    Maybe Dave S. should show his abs in the post….

    HUGS…

  36. Craig on September 26, 2008 at 10:35 pm

    LOL. Sorry Polt. I joke with my friends that this isn’t really a blog I write. Rather it’s a chatroom I tend to moderate. :-P

    It just goes to show what awesome readers I have.

  37. polt on September 27, 2008 at 8:23 am

    Hehehe, yah, Craiggers, I think your assessment is correct.

    Although being as cute as you are certainly wouldn’t hurt…in anything!

    HUGS…

  38. Mark on September 27, 2008 at 12:01 pm

    Nicky: If you take me off your blacklist I promise I won’t send you the pic of me getting out of a car with no panties on ;-)

  39. Nicky on September 27, 2008 at 12:49 pm

    Wait… so if you STAY on it, you WILL send the pic?!
    Then you’re staying on it. Duh.

  40. Ed on September 27, 2008 at 4:55 pm

    On the PR side – I really liked Kenley until that episode and I realized that she’s got a bad attitude. But I’m glad Suede is gone he never impressed me and the 3rd person talk had to go. But I’m rooting for Korto she’s just really good.

    And if you really like Mrs Bassey check our her cover of Pink’s “I’m coming Up” it’s golden.

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