Let’s face it, there’s only one way to celebrate an election. That’s right! Meet people on Craigslist for discrete online hook ups! No matter who you voted for, everyone wins! Here are a few of my favorites from the New York listings:
OBAMA WON AND SO CAN YOU – m4w – 27
YOUNG BLACk MALE LOOKING TO PLEASE A WHITE OR LATIN WOMEN WITH A BIG BLACK ROD FOR THE NEW GENERATION.
inferior sub jew for Superior Dom White Angry About Obama Win 18-35 – m4m
If you’re a trim, white, self-centered guy between 18 and 35 who knows that he deserves to be worshipped, served and obeyed please allow me to grovel at your feet. I’m a masculine, in-shape, 53yr. jewish sub who would like to be your servant/slave, take your abuse and humiliation. Not worthy of having sex with YOU but could serve as your footstool. Like to be slapped and stepped on for your amusement, made to crawl and beg. Would appreciate any attention you allow me. Your superiority is always understood. Straight/bi/gay
Stroke my erection while I watch the Election – m4m – 25
will wear my Obama mask while you wear the McCain mask and perform fellatio. I’m only interested in the election. You need to get me to climax before all the votes are tallied but not before 95% of them are polled. Afterward, there will be an optional Ménage à trois with a 3rd party candidate.
Let’s Celebrate and have some fun! Go OBAMA!!! – m4w – 26
Single white male here in BK feels like celebrating history. Wanna celebrate with me? I have some 420 to share. Wanna meet up for a drink and go from there? Drop me a line and I will send my phone number so we can talk first. I have pics. Do you? I am into all ages, shapes, races and sizes, so don’t be shy ladies!
Celebrate Obama’s Victory – a Black Democrat Pussy Needed – m4w – 26
Black Dem pussy only.
I’m a good looking, professional, fit and fun male.
Let’s have a crazy night of celebration.
White Boy wants to celebrate Obama with Black Girl – m4w – 36
I feel so good about the Obama win, I want to experience the racial harmony I think this signifies. I want to make love to a black woman to commemorate the new day in this country, how blacks and whites will move forward together, and of course, for some hot sex.
Hot white guy 5’11, blue eyes, brown hair. I would love to lick and nibble your chocolate pussy.
I was going to search through listings in other areas, but I’m still sick, so I need to cut this post short. That’s where you come in! Yes, you! Search through the Craigslist personals in your area and leave any good election ones you find in the comment section. I found it best to search for the terms “Election”, “Obama”, and “McCain”. Happy hunting!
110 lbs?! I weight 110. I don’t know if Dave S does. That’d be kind of weird.
And yeah, Dave S gets picked on a lot….
Know who can never get picked on? Tam! She’s awesome! : )
polt, the goal of the ad was to leave Dave’S with as many possibilities as possible, since I have no idea what he actually wants or needs (beside getting laid). I have only theoretical knowledge about straight mating habits and didn’t want to apply gay hook-up strategies to his ad. But I know squat about those as well. BF and I have been together since before the dawn of time (aehh the www) and if we ever broke up I’d be up sh*t creek. I also wanted to avoid any mention of Dave’S fAbs, since he thinks that’s all I’m interested in.
Enrikomono: I’m pretty sure Dave S. weighs more than 110…but remember, he could wera a tight wife-beater that his own 16 year old daughter couldn;t. He’s pretty lean.
bernd: Dave S. knows (or at least I HOPE he knows) he’s more than a set of abs to me. But if you’re looking for a hookup online, why not just use your best sexiest attribute? And that’s why on all my webads, I talk about my sense of humor, and nothing physical.
HUGS…
Sheesh, I run off for lunch, come back, and I’m gettin all sorts of picked-on!
bernd: Try 5’11″ and 140. “Must love gay bloggers!” — now *that* was an LOL moment.
This was an excellent post, thanks Craig!
I thought this one was sweet. In missed encounters for atlanta:
OK, I know this is cheesey…and of course, I have never posted here before, but Passed you on I-85 this morning and I loved your bumper stickers
Where did you get the Gay Dad sticker? I have kids too, and would love to have that bumper sticker.
Oh yeah, the Obama sticker was great too….but, when will this damn thing be over? Is this the longest campaign in history or is it just me?
Ha I think my craigslist personal ad would say something like:
Need someone to distract me from all the Election and Post Election news. Come to my place and send me into sexual ecstasy with your argyle hotness.
Subtle Joe, subtle.
That other one was cute. I wonder about those “looking for” posts. You have to assume that other people check randomly just to see if anyone is looking for them. Why would it even occur to the bumper sticker Dad to check Craig’s list?
Why are we talking about non-important issues like the election and Craiglist instead of today’s hot button topic: Survivor!
Poor Marcus! I am dying to see Charlie’s reaction next week when he sees they voted his str8 crush off.
OMG!!!! Straight boy is gone? Oh I’ve never seen the show. Why did they vote him off? Do you need a reason to be voted off? Was he evil? Devious? Didn’t put out enough? Do tell.
Tam: They reconfigured the tribes. Susie flipped and voted him off. Our hopes for a Charlie/Marcus merge have been dashed. And they might have been the new Huxtables (physician/lawyer).
Yeah, Marcus wasnt a bad guyexcept that he made the fatal mistake of thinking he had control in the game and, like it almost always does, it bit him in the ass because a weaker player found him threatening. I’m really waiting for that to happen to Randy and his smug ass.
I was hoping it would be Charlie that bit him in the ass and there would be video.
We are all so bored and unmotivated around here today. We’ve planned our Christmas party. In-house margarita party. Ole. We’ll bring in some blenders, start drinking at 2:00 and eating chips and salsa. Who wants to come? Oh and we’ll need some music. Maybe I should take the bus that day.
Last two years our Christmas parties sucked. Lunch at a boring restaurant. Yawn. Hopefully this year will be better, my last hurrah with the group.
I’ll be there in spirit. Have a margarita for me!
Craig, I love you just a little more each day. This post is hi-larious.
I hate office parties and will avoid this years Christmas party again. I escaped hastily into my lunchbreak when last week’s Halloween parade started winding their way through the cubicles. I feel like so young and rebellious when I do that, flying in the face of convention. Oh how exciting my life is.
I have to say that some of those are very disturbing.
Anyway, Happy early Birthday Craig!
Bernd: I refuse to go to any parties after hours. 5:00 and I’m heading home. I don’t like anyone I work with enough to spend my off hours with them, but during the day it beats actually working. Ummm, Halloween costume parades? I’m assuming you don’t work in an elementary school since you metioned cubicles. That’s over the top.
>>>>>>>BLOW FOR OBAMA<<<<<< – 44 (redwood shores)
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Reply to: pers-905922513@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-11-04, 2:20PM PST
HEY ALL OBAMA SUPPORTERS…..I’M DOING MY PATRIOTIC DUTY AND GIVING ALL SUPPORTERS A FREE BLOW-N-GO…BEFORE OR AFTER YOU STOP BY AND CAST YOUR VOTE…..SO CUM ON OUT AND VOTE….SHOW ME YOUR STICKERS AND I’LL GET DOWN ON MY KNEES FOR OUR NEW PRESIDENT ….I NEED TO SHOW MY SUPPORT GUYS!!!!!!!
Tam, I totally agree, I really like my colleagues, but not after hours. Yep, I’m an office-drone, doing business-travel business for a large international company. Our social committee is quite active, so Halloween costumes are only the tip of the iceberg, my favorite is the annual ice-cream social.
Bernd: What the hell IS an ice-cream social? LOL That is so not a Canadian thing. The only time of year our whole place gets into a social spirit is for United Way in the fall and then its hit and miss. Our division doesn’t do anything, some do. The only thing we do periodically is go for lunch and before one of my colleague left for the Ukraine we used to have vodka parties about once a month at the end of the day, but everyone left at 5:00 as usual. Now he’s gone …. nada.
Happy Birthday Craig!!! Have a great one!
You inspired a blog post… Go over to my blog to see a non-election related but just as chuckle worthy entry that should have appeared on Craigslist (and maybe has)…