PRESIDENT JAMES BUCHANAN
I heard a conservative pundit the other day say that if Bill Clinton was the first black president (referring to a remark made by Toni Morrison in 1998) then that would make Barack Obama the first gay president, because with him as president, gays would run rampant and be all up in your crib. And by “all up in your crib” I mean “actually in your cribs, teaching your babies that being gay is okay”. I was shocked and appalled by this! I mean, didn’t he know we already had our first gay president? Wait, you didn’t know we already had our first gay president? Why of course its our fifteenth president James Buchanan who was in office from 1857 to 1861 silly!
Okay, so like most historical gays (I’m looking at you Alexander!) it’s not exactly proven, but you just know he was a big old homo. First off, he was the only president never to be married, which, you know… (::flips wrist::) In fact, Harriet Lane, an orphaned niece whom he had adopted, acted as his First Lady. It’s actually due to Harriet Lane that the term “First Lady” was used because you couldn’t refer to her as “Mrs. President” because her and the President weren’t married.
So what else made Buchanan such a flaming flame of flamocity, you ask? Well for fifteen years, before he was president, Buchanan lived with his also unmarried “close friend” Alabama Senator Gayle King William King and even then people were talking about it. Aaron Brown, Governor of Tennessee at the time referred to the pair as “Buchanan and his wife”. Also, when King was appointed minister to France, Buchanan wrote in a letter:
“I am now solitary and alone, having no companion in the house with me. I have gone a wooing to several gentlemen, but have not succeeded with any one of them. I feel that it is not good for man to be alone, and [I] should not be astonished to find myself married to some old maid who can nurse me when I am sick, provide good dinners for me when I am well, and not expect from me any very ardent or romantic affection.”
Interesting! You know what else is interesting? The nieces of both Buchanan and King destroyed all the letters between the two men after their deaths. That’s like deleting all the dirty text messages you sent when you were drunk the night before! So there you have it. Bill Clinton may have been the first black president, but Barack Obama is certainly not the first gay one. I guess he’ll just have to be satisfied being remembered as the first president born outside the continental United States instead.
NOW TELL ME SOMETHING I DON’T KNOW!
Hmm so the first, “first lady” was a fag hag. How wonderful.
And lovely to see that the Teach me Something Tuesdays are back, I was beginning to feel lazy and stupid on Tuesdays. Have great Veteran’s Day everyone!
Huh. Go figure. Here is my little piece of info in honor of Remembrance Day as we call it here. Its a holiday for me and I’m still up because my daughter has to be at school for 7:20 and I’m the driver. That bites but anyway …
People in Canada (the Commonwealth really) wear a red poppy around the time of Remembrance Day. The poppy’s significance is a result of Canadian military physician John McCrae’s poem In Flanders Fields. The poppy emblem was chosen because of the poppies that bloomed across some of the worst battlefields of Flanders in World War I, their red colour an appropriate symbol for the bloodshed of trench warfare. In every school assembly today some child will read In Flanders Field and if I go to said assemblies I always get all sappy and emotional.
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved, and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
Here is a picture of our poppies:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Lest_we_forget.jpg
Very very interesting Craig, Well done!
Now, the history of Argyle Socks! Argyle socks were very popular in the 1920’s. They were usually over the calf socks that were worn with knickers or short pants. The word Argyle describes a pattern of two or more colored diamonds.
Argyles were first seen in Britain. They were worn by members of the Campbell clan. They were from Argyll, Scotland. The clan became popular when they were mentioned by the Scottish novelist and poet Sir Walter Scott. The name of the socks became Argyles after the Scottish town.
In the late eighteenth century the knitted pattern was beginning to be adopted by many manufacturers’ as the Argyle Plaid. The socks became known as argyle socks. Their popularity waxed and waned over the years.
The original pattern of the Campbell clan was the traditional green and white colors. In modern times the argyle pattern can be any combination of any two colors. Traditionally bright colors have been used but now just about any color can be used.
Argyle socks are not just for men any longer either. They are now worn by women and kids as well. Argyle socks for women/girls are now made in a variety of pastel colors as well as the traditional brighter colors. Argyles for men are also now made with more subdued browns, blues, and other dark colors.
Argyle socks regained popularity in the 1980’s with Preppies. They have been popular with golfer’s as well. They are generally machine knitted with a light cotton or synthetic fiber for comfort and ease of wear.
There you go….Welcome back Teach Me Something Tuesday!
Love the veiled Oprah reference…
I’d also heard that, prior to his presidency, Abe Lincoln had a homosexual relationship for four years.
teach you something…ok I heard a rumour that Hitler and Stalin had a torrid affair in their younger years. But they were torn apart by a cruel and misunderstanding world. thereby leading directly to WWII. Thanks homophobes!*
* this may or may not be complete bullshit
Wow, cool beans! Didn’t know about that First Lady thing, and I think it’s kind of sweet that he was “a-wooing” and all. I mean, if you’re the president, even TODAY, you don’t exactly go “a-wooing” other guys. You look at your wife and THINK about “a-wooing” while you’re “a-doing”, but … yeah. >>
Hmmm…. very interesting. I had no idea.
Weren’t peeps mad homophobic back then? I’m surprised he wasn’t called out on it more.
And you mentioned two of my favorite black ladies in this post! Good job.
ANd one other thing, Buchanan was the only president from Pennsylvania, which is where none other than flaming gay Polt is from!!! So there, what more connection do you need?
HUGS…
digkv: I’m always lazy and stupid. Today is no exception.
Tam: Happy Remembrance Day!
Hayden: Well played with the Argyle lesson!
JP: Lincoln came right after Buchanan. Ba dum bum.
Claudia: I don’t care. I will spread it around anyway.
Chris: “a-wooing” is my new favorite word. LOL @ “a-doingâ€
Enriko: As I wrote this, I thought to myself: “If only I knew who Enriko’s 3rd favorite black woman was it would be a trifecta of awesomeness.”
Polt: When do you plan on becoming the 2nd president from Pennsylvania?
Craig: I was thinking the same thing about Polt. 2012 perhaps. I’d vote for him. Oh right, I can’t vote. Oh well, in my heart I’d vote for him.
LOL @ the first lady was a fag hag!
Oh…the clincher as far as proof of Buchanan’s blatant faggotry…both of his china patterns were PINK!
Zac: He probably liked argyle too.
I agree with everyone else. Tuesdays were a bright spot. Then they were boring.
And now we have fag ex-presidents. Sweet.
Not sure when I’ll become Prez, but when I do Craiggers, I’ll make you Secretary Of Argyles.
HUGS…
Polt: The lack of a comma before Craiggers completely changes the meaning in a Freudian way that I have come to expect from you.
I wouldn’t be so sure about the strict heterosexuality of some recent presidents.
John Kennedy was said to “sleep with” anyone that wore a skirt. This reference is from a Vanity Fair article that described J. Edgar “Mary”Hoover in a black cocktail dress.
Lyndon Johnson was known to be fond of barnyard animals.
Richard Nixon was too ugly to be of much interest to anyone.
Gerald Ford and Jimmy Carter were probably straight.
Ronald Reagan was a Hollywood actor.
George H. W. Bush was an ultra
effeteelite member of the upper crust. He went to Yale. His wife wore tacky pearls and smoked Newport cigarettes.Bill Clinton see comments about John Kennedy
George W Bush I was so drunk I can’t remember what happened
Barack Obama He went to law school in Boston
A Freudian slip implies it was unintentional, which may or may not be the case here. I may be just trying to use subliminal (you want to kiss Polt) messages on Craiggers, (you want to kiss Polt) ya know?
HU(you want to kiss Polt) GS…
My third favorite black lady?
Why’d that be Aunt Pearlie Sue. You MUST hear her.
http://www.knowitall.org/gullahtales/tales/redhen/flash/index.html
Enriko: haha Gullah, that’s incredibly awesome. That had me laughing like crazy. It also brings back memories of Gullah Gullah Island and that gigantic polywog
Gullah Gullah Island! I used to love that show.
But Aunt Pearlie Sue is even better than GGI.
i sure wish i could remember on what blog i saw a link to your blog
reading the last few posts has turned me into a stalker!!
just warning you, so you won’t think you have an ugly troll or something~~just a straight girl who loves living in a gay world
in bigoted, narrow minded arkansas
it’s me who will be reading all your posts