Dec
24
On our last vacation, my friend Aaron taught us that it’s fun to put the word “ass” in front of SUV names. And by golly he was right! So that’s what we did for the remainder of the vacation. Here are some of my favorites:
Ass-Bronco
Ass-Hummer
Ass-Expedition
Ass-Escape
Ass-Pathfinder
Ass-Endeavor
Ass-Mountaineer
Ass-Navigator
Ass-Commander
Ass-Patriot
Ass-Wrangler
Ass-Grand Cherokee
Ass-Pilot
Ass-Envoy
Ass-Trailblazer
Ass-Rendezvous
That top picture is of me and Aaron when we were roasting marshmallows in Vermont with Robin and Jenn. The second picture is from college, approximately 8 years ago. Oy! Was college really 8 years ago?
December 24th, 2008 at 5:26 am
haha that sounds like an awesomely fun game Craig i love Ass-expedition. Merry Christmas to you Craig! May you and your family have a great holiday season!
Also, I must note, your sobriety must be questioned in that second picture there.
December 24th, 2008 at 7:34 am
Craig, you and Aaron look absolutely adorable in the 2nd pic. But looking at the sheets, I’m wondering whether it only has been 8 years, and not 18. But since they look so rumpled, maybe it’s 8
Fab idea about the Ass-UVs.
Ass-Cayenne is not something I want to try.
Ass-X3 and Ass-X5 sound like some mega-fast stool-softeners.
Ass-Q7 is probably someone with intelligence below current outside temp. But doesn’t that hold true for all Ass-UV drivers?
December 24th, 2008 at 7:35 am
Ass-Navigator, wasn’t that a porn movie? Or maybe it was Ass-Commander. Polt, can you confirm that for me?
You were so awesomely adorable when you were young. You are still adorable, but in a more manly way now. Have an wonderful Christmas eve.
December 24th, 2008 at 8:12 am
How would you feel if you were a donkey?
December 24th, 2008 at 8:48 am
digkv: LOL. No, that’s not a drunk picture. That’s a silly face picture. But mine is just bad silly.
Bernd: That’s not our bed. That’s a female friend of ours. And me and Aaron never made the bed sheets rumple
Tam: Yes, very manly these days
chamblee54: huh?
December 24th, 2008 at 9:03 am
Craig: I think Chamblee means that donkeys are also known as asses and they may not like being associated with SUVs.
Ass-Wrangler is my personal favorite and I am totally telling this to my nephews tomorrow. This is hysterical.
I love Aaron’s expression in the top pic. It is as if he is thinking “This is Craig, my “special” friend. He is lucky he is cute.”
December 24th, 2008 at 9:07 am
John: Thank you for clearing up Chamblee’s post. I was lost. I’m hoping your nephews aren’t in elementary school John.
December 24th, 2008 at 9:15 am
Tam: Nope, the youngest one in that family is 19.
I also forgot to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. I hope Santa is good to you all and that he treads lightly with his jolly boots of doom. Happy Chanukah to those celebrating the festival of lights.
December 24th, 2008 at 9:18 am
Don’t forget the good ol’ Ass-Rodeo.
December 24th, 2008 at 9:22 am
Tam: Ass-Commander, definitely a porno, albeit not a terribly good one. The acting was a bit…stiff.
Craiggers, you and Aaron both are so adorable! both 8 years ago and now. I think were I to see you both in person, I’d go into cuteness overload and fall right into a coma. but I suppose, if one’s got to go into a coma that’s the way to do it, eh?
Happy holidays to everyone in Puntabuland! May it be the best holiday you’ve ever had!
HUGS…
December 24th, 2008 at 9:41 am
really glad you explained that you’re eating a marshmallow in the first picture… i thought that was a tampon. i’m messed up in the head.
December 24th, 2008 at 10:02 am
The Ass Endeavor is my personal favorite
Although I kinda like the Ass Commander too.
December 24th, 2008 at 10:51 am
Best.Christmas.Eve.Post.Ever!
December 24th, 2008 at 10:58 am
Craig 20 years later: “If I had only known how Hot I was back then, I would have gotten alot more….’attention’.”
Oh wait, that’s me looking at my pics from 20 years ago. Why didn’t you two hook up? I’m guessing from the pics it was You, Not Him.
December 24th, 2008 at 11:13 am
I almost added “Ass-Tahoe” to the list. It doesn’t make sense, but I just think it’s so funny.
Halo: eeeeeeeeewwwwwww
Mark: When I first met Aaron I was totally smitten with him, but he was with someone else at the time. Since then we’ve become good friends, so a relationship doesn’t appear to be in the cards for us.
December 24th, 2008 at 11:20 am
Craig: I get it. But I just can’t help being completely confused as to why a catch like you hasn’t been “snatched” (ewwww) up.
Seriously, you’re a Great guy. When I go to Mass tonight, I’ll pray for you to find your Soulmate!
December 24th, 2008 at 11:24 am
You forgot to mention my Ass-Montero.
Merry and Happy. You keep writing, I’ll keep reading.
December 24th, 2008 at 11:27 am
But if you find your Soulmate, then you would have less time to devote to us……
That’s OK, I’ll still pray for your happiness anyway. Yes I’m semi-religious, so shoot me.
December 24th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
I used to have an Ass-Explorer, but had to trade it in for an Ass-Caravan which isn’t an Ass-You-Vee but I think is still funny.
I’ll write to Santa to see if he can get Craig a man for Christmas, one can always hope for a Christmas miracle
December 24th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
The Pope has been in the news lately. He likes to say things.
Ass Benedict has a certain ring to it.
Although that is a mean thing to say about donkeys.
December 24th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
I have a very similar game, but I add anal to the front of Ford vehicles to come up with porn movie names:
Anal-Explorer
Anal-Mustang
Anal-Expedition
Anal-Focus
Anal-Ranger
Anal-Taurus
Anal-Escape
Anal-Fusion
and my favorite…
Anal-Fiesta
December 24th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
Anal-Fiesta is amazing!
Anal-Fusion sounds painful.
December 24th, 2008 at 1:32 pm
Andy: Those are funny. Don’t forget my old car, the Anal-Escort. Do you have to pay extra for that?
December 24th, 2008 at 1:49 pm
Tam: Yes, but even then you are still not quite sure where it will take you at the end of the evening. Where the Anal-Nova is a firm declaration of your “pitcher” status (for those of you scratching your heads translate the Spanish term “no va” which also explains why those cars never sold well south of the border)
December 24th, 2008 at 2:24 pm
Thanks Craig – and commenters – for my daily dose of funny. I’ll never look at an SUV the same way again.
Happy whatever, everyone!
December 24th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Cute photos, and a funny story.
December 24th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
I am making my new screen name Ass-Wrangler, love the sound of it, lol, Happy Holidays to one and all!
December 24th, 2008 at 8:22 pm
ExAstris: I don’t think you can just ‘make’ your name “Ass-Wrangler”…isn’t that an honored title that you have to earn?
HUGS…
December 25th, 2008 at 4:02 am
Test
December 25th, 2008 at 4:03 am
Dang it. Still no icon image.
December 25th, 2008 at 4:04 am
I give up.
December 25th, 2008 at 9:48 am
Ass- Ram Charger
December 28th, 2008 at 10:07 am
I think the top picture should totally be the subject of a caption contest.