Monthly Archives: February 2009

Okay, so I accidentally ordered two copies of The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra on DVD from Amazon (don’t ask) and rather than going through the trouble of sending one of them back, I’ve decided to hold a contest for it. You may be thinking to yourself: “What the hell is that movie and why would I want it?” Well, it’s a parody of those 1950′s science fiction B-movies and because it’s hysterical. Here is the trailer:

You’ve all met Captain Flaccid, now I need you to: Create the next great super villain for Super Viagra and Vagina Girl to battle!

1. Start with one of my pre-made male or female forms. You are allowed to adjust the form as you see fit, or create a non-human form as long as it fits in with the aesthetic of previous Super Viagra and Vagina Girl strips.

2. Use MSPaint. I know a lot of you guys prefer photoshop, but I don’t have it, and I would like to be able to seamlessly incorporate your creation into a Super Viagra and Vagina Girl strip. If you need to use another program, don’t get too fancy. I’d like it to blend in with my normal cartoons, which means solid colors, no shading, or crazy photoshopy backgrounds.

3. Be creative! Along with your drawing, give me your super villain’s name, origin story, and list of special powers. If you need ideas for what is possible, check out the Puntabulous People on Parade.

4. Save it as a BMP or PNG file. Don’t save it as a JPG, it compresses the colors and will make it more difficult for me to manage and incorporate into one of my strips.

5. E-mail me your creation by next Friday, March 6, 2009.

After I have all the submissions, I’ll judge them myself and decide on a winner with consultation from friends and family, or if there is no clear winner, I’ll post either all of the submissions, or a shortlisted group of them and open it up to a public vote the week of March 9th. Once the winner is chosen, I’ll mail them the DVD free of charge, and begin working on a new Super Viagra and Vagina Girl strip with their new super villain. Even if your super villain doesn’t win the contest, I may ask for your permission to use your super villain in future strips!

Let me know if you have any questions and get to work!

Okay, I realize I’ve been a walking commercial for Twitter lately, but I’m totally addicted. It’s like the best part of Facebook (the statuses!) all rolled up into one wonderful network. And naturally I’m using Twitterrific on my iPhone so I can update wherever I am and even include camera phone pics! Even on the train ride home from work like I did tonight! For all those people who haven’t jumped on the Twitter bandwagon yet, here is what you’re missing out on:

Craig thinks the fact that the man holding a smoothie sitting next to him on the train is falling asleep can only end badly.

This can only end badly… http://twitpic.com/1p0tn

OMG! Any minute now! http://twitpic.com/1p107

I’m sweating bullets! http://twitpic.com/1p14u

Oooooohhh! There we go! So far, it’s not as bad as I was expecting http://twitpic.com/1p160

He’s awake now and appears to be as grateful as I am that there was no spillage… http://twitpic.com/1p1h0

Be sure to click on each of the links to get the full effect of each Tweet! It sure was a nail biter! Now go join!

Found this over at Towleroad and just had to share it with you guys. Jamie Bamber from Battlestar Galactica sheds his clothes for PETA. Apparently Canadian Black Bears are used for the fur caps of the Queen’s Royal Guard.

While I’m all for protecting animal rights (I started up an organization in high school with a friend called FACT: Fighting Animal Cruelty Together. Clever, right?) I don’t agree with a lot of what PETA does, and their tactics seem to be a bit on the crazy train, but I’d say they got this one right. And let’s not forget about these shots, which pay tribute to a memorable BSG scene:

And you’re not watching Battlestar Galactica, why?

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. ” –Theodore Roosevelt

And they’re using toiletries to do it! Those evil maniacal bastards! How did I come to this conclusion, you ask? Well I’ll tell you. A few years back my Mom started buying me Axe bodywash. I didn’t really think much about it at the time, but there were either two reasons why she would have done this for me. At first I thought it was because I smelt like feet, but now I realize it’s because her and Dad want to kill me. I know that sounds like quite a leap in logic, but I think you’ll understand my reasoning when we’re through.

Anyway, all the Axe commercials warn you that if you use this stuff you’ll be swarmed by hot babes. Well that may sound all fine and dandy, but I could suffocate! Yes, it could happen! I mean, it hasn’t, but it could! Okay fine, I see that you’re unimpressed. Well welcome to Exhibit B. Why yes, it’s more Axe bodywash. This time it came in my Christmas stocking and it was travel sized! “Hey Craig, here’s some travel sized body wash. But only use it when you’re out of town and me and your father can arrange an alibi.” Wait, what?

That’s right! The bodywash is red! RED! Wait a second, oh hold on, let me find a link. Yes, here it is. This exhibit will be much more damning when I remind you that I’m allergic to red dyes! Dun dun duuuuuun! The travel size package was quite clever of them, but as soon as I saw it, I began to notice the glint in their eyes every time (really? that’s still two words?) they looked at me, that just screamed “Red Axe, Red Axe.” Sadly, “Exader” doesn’t have the same ring to it as “Murder”, but you get the idea.

Somehow I managed to avoid death at every turn. The Axe was literally at my throat and I deflected it’s blade with little more than my genius and daring. But nothing could prepare me for the brazen actions I had coming towards me. My parents were getting desperate. They wanted me dead and they didn’t care how they did it. Next came this tube of Close-Up brand toothpaste.

Nevermind the fact that I could die of embarrassment alone. I mean, seriously, who ever heard of Close-Up brand toothpaste? What are we, on austerity? Is the economic crisis so bad, we can’t splurge the extra 20 cents for Colgate? Crest? Anything? But yes, you guessed it, the toothpaste is also red! “Here Craig, rub this red dye into your gums and directly into your bloodstream. Your father and I will be in the other room chopping onions so we look properly devastated by your untimely demise.”

So there we have it. My parents are trying to kill me. You may be thinking that I should just buy my own toiletries from now on if my parents are trying to kill me so badly with the ones they buy, but since I’m still living at home, I have the mentality of a seventeen year old. And when was the last time you saw a seventeen year old buy their own toothpaste? Exactly.

Does the awesomeness of my readers know no bounds? I think not. Back in the comment section of this post, we discussed how I don’t really talk about music much on this blog, but that I do love music and finding new artists. So commenter GoKitty, jumped on the case and sent me a CD of 155 songs for me to try out. How awesome is that?

The not so awesome part? He put a Hello Kitty decal on it! ACK! But he says he did it before the Pop Icon debate where I declared Hello Kitty a useless bastard, so I guess I can’t hold it against him. Thanks for the CD GoKitty! I’ll be sure to post about artists and songs I find irresistible.

Okay fine, I’m on Twitter now. I can’t promise I’ll update often, but feel free to add me on there. Is there a way I can add my status to my blog? I don’t have sidebars so is there a way to add it without a widget? HTML code that I could put right into my template, perhaps? I think it would look fun underneath the toolbar up top, but don’t know how I could do it. If anyone knows, please help.