So I’m reading Twilight. After enjoying the movie and hearing about how much everyone loves the books, I decided to give it a try. Um, so basically it’s a romance novel. Seriously? I don’t want to read romance novels. I want to read fun adventures stories with vampires and werewolves. But so far the entire book (I’m about one third through) has been about Bella hating herself and loving the amazingly beautiful Edward. And they don’t even have sex, so it’s a chaste romance novel. What’s the fun in that? And are we supposed to hate Bella as much as she hates herself? Because I kinda hate her. I hate how rude she is to her nice normal friends, especially Mike, who was so gosh darn cute in the movie. Oh, but everyone loooves Bella and she gets asked to the dance by three guys and turns them all down because none of them are a vampire. Ugh! And even after being asked to the dance by three guys, she still has zero self-confidence and continuously doubts herself at the drop of a hat. What kind of hero/narrator is this? I can’t get behind her. And don’t even get me started on the clumsiness. Can we put the clumsy girl/woman cliché to bed please? I’m still going to keep reading it, but it better get good fast. We just met Jacob, and I kinda loved him, so I’m already on Team Jacob. But I have a feeling that’s not going to work out so well for me.
Seriously. I’m reading Twilight. Ugh.
Filed under Books
I’m so glad that I have no clue about any of this. About the book: You may have found the one exception where a gay man does not think like a female teenager: Body related self-confidence issues.
Brittney? check
Boybands? check
gossip: check
cliquishness: check
I assume the reason why the books are such big hits with girls and young women is, because they can all relate to the heroines issues.
If it isn’t fun you don’t have to read anymore.
I really enjoyed the books, and while I thought Bella was being a bitch for a bit, I got caught up in all the romance stuff. Hm. I might just be gayer than you are!
I tried to read them. I read 2 of the Twilight series. I’ve not seen the movie yet but plan to… but the books are painful to read. Aside from all the teen over-angst, the writing is shallow and poor. It was really painful. I wanted to like, I really, really did. Maybe I’ll get to the rest of the series as my easy summer reading?
I’ve read more than one article about the Twilight books as covert “abstinence-only” education. The unspoken literary allusion that vampirism = AIDS, or at least STDs or unwanted pregnancy. I usually avoid any fiction (gay, sci-fi, etc.) that is a “coming of age” story.
But Bernd, you don’t think gay’s have body-related self-confidence issues? Seriously? I haven’t been a teen for over 20 years and I STILL have body-related self-confidence issues. 2/3rds of the gays at any gym have body-related self-confidence issues. I mean, that’s why we GO there.
I was going to read this series too, and then I changed my mind. I’m reading the Sookie Stackhouse books right now, and I’m really loving them. The are the books that HBO’s True Blood series are based on. You might give them a try…
I’m glad you posted this cause I was thinking about picking it up to read it. I mean, all the cute guys in the movie (which i still haven’t seen), how could I NOT like it?
But a CHASTE romance novel? My God, who would make such a thing? I mean that’s as bad as non-alcoholic beer, working holidays and gay Republicans! They’re all simply abherrations of nature!
HUGS…
Yep, not my kind of book either and I like romance books. My daughter is firmly in the Team Jacob camp and LOVED your “Buffy staked Edward” t-shirt that you posted. She devoured them all but was not at all impressed with the last one. They have sex in the last one, after they are married of course because that’s “proper” and the birthing scene is pretty gruesome apparently. I’m not sure WHY they go so darn popular so fast but I will give her credit for getting my kid glued to books again so I guess not a total waste.
Haha…I love this. I admit to breezing my way through the series. They do get better as they go along (as long as you can get through the second one). That being said, just because I read them, does not mean I did not see their (major) faults. Happy reading!
The last three have more action, but they remain pretty chaste throughout
Related to Twilight, as I was hanging in a bookstore one night (yeah, my life is the envy of all) I overheard a youngish female clerk (20 maybe) talking to a woman about Twilight. She wanted to buy it for her daughter who’s a youngish teen and the clerk said that she didn’t think it was a good idea because the books promote the idea that a young girl has to find Prince Charming and get married at 18 and then they’ll live happily ever after. She said that they were encouraging young girls to “fall in love” and get married too early. Huh? I (not being able to shut up) basically stepped in and said they were fine and I highly doubted that a 14 year old was going to run out and get married because two fictional characters did it. It was weird. The clerk gave me the evil eye and walked away.
I’m not a fan of the books but sheesh, I don’t think there’s a rash of vampire/human marriages at 18 because of it.
I have a friend who read all the books and thought they were drivel. We have a mutual friend who thinks the same, but she has never read them. We think she makes fun of it because all the cool kids are goofing on it too. She went so far as to see the film simply for the LOLs….I’m not convinced of that.
I haven’t read them or seen the film, it holds no interest for me.
For your enjoyment: CLICK HERE
I agree with Liz about “all the teen over-angst” being painful to read. I read the first book and am halfway through the 2nd book. Be warned that in the nearly 500 pages of the first book it takes over 300 pages for Bella to ask the first relevant question of her new vampire boyfriend and in total there are probably only 30 pages or so with any real interesting action. So why am I reading the 2nd book? Because once I start a book or a series I have to finish it. I have only put down one book after starting to read it. I am just wired that way. But I did enjoy the movie… A lot less teen angst and a lot more getting to the point.
Tam: vampires are pretty hot, i woulda married one at 18. If I could have found one. A hot one I mean. And gay marriage would have been legal. Then, not now.
See, that’s my unconditional love thing going on there!
HUGS…
I’ll probably read at some point just because it’s now a huge pop culture thing.
I read the first few pages once and thought the writing was VERY awkward and needed a lot of smoothing out. Did she not hire an editor?
Enrico, it doesn’t seem like she hired one in the first book. I hear the editing gets smoother as the books go on, though. Keep plugging along Craig! I forced myself to finish the book before the movie came out on DVD. I’ve been trying to read the 2nd book in the series, but I’m finding it difficult to get going. Perhaps by the time the movie for it comes out, I MAY force myself once again.
I read the book because my teenage niece wanted me to, so I could feel all self sacrificing. Of course, in truth I enjoyed all three books and am looking forward to when the library has the fourth book free. I didn’t ever really see the appeal of Edward in the book or the movie so I guess that eliminates the Vampire option from Tam’s post], but I didn’t mind the writing otherwise. (I’m downplaying it. I really did enjoy them. I secretly like Hannah Montana, too.)
The fact that the action was chaste didn’t bother me, since most sex scenes in books seem really poorly written and I’m grateful when the author spares me. (No wonder I’m not allowed to comment on Polt’s site.)
I don’t have any interest in these books, but was starting to doubt myself after several “intelligent” friends enjoyed the series. Now I know after reading your review and subsequent comments I will not bother wasting my time. Hey, who knew it was Teach Me Something Friday????
You can’t comment, heather? Well that bites! Can’t you comment anonymously and then put your name at the bottom of your comment (and i KNOW that sounds insane, but she knows what I mean!)
HUGS…
No — I can’t see the Visual Verification thing so it won’t let me comment. It just says “Visual Verification” and I try to publish the comment and it laughs at me. [TwoPi was able to find a way around that, so I could use the house computer instead of my laptop but then I'd have to go all.the.way up to the attic and I'm really lazy].
Stop calling these books. They are not books. They are bad fanfiction.
If you’re not reading it in a so-bad-it’s-good kind of way, you can stop now.
Straight, chaste fan fiction?
It sounds like Harry Potter should be involved.
I’m with you. I am totally in the Jacob/Werewolf camp. They are the only reason I keep reading.
I know nothing about Twilight, sorry. I am going on a three day road trip though, maybe I’ll meet some vampires on the road. That would be cool.
OK, Twilight aside, is it me or is this the day that would not end?!?
OHMIGOD, john, you are SO right!!! It feels like I’ve been at work for three days already. Gah!
HUGS…
Mark: Pack a turtleneck just in case you run into one of those vampires. Hide the evidence and all that.
john: Fridays are often long.
Love your new name Ryan. Not just any Ryan but THE Ryan.
I let my admin person go home at two, but 5:00 seems like it is an eternity away. It doesn’t help that I am writing a user manual which is about as interesting as Bella Swan (worst character name EVER!). This has been a very long and stressful week and I will be glad when it is over.
Tam: I read your article, it was great! I’m just really behind on commenting.
Ryan: I want a cupcake too. Where’s Chris when you need him?
John: No biggie. Chris never did come through with those cupcakes last time did he?
Tam: Turtleneck Hell, I;m wearing those bite marks with pride. But unfortunately I doubt if there are many vampires in Big Beaver, PA.
Mark: Big Beaver? Seriously? That’s a town? Competes with Dildo, New Foundland for best town name.
Tam: I figured it was a good way to distinguish myself.
john: I don’t have actual cupcakes right now, but they do sound like a wonderful idea for tomorrow.
Ryan: I’m going to call you what I usually call Craig: You tease.
I read all four and saw the movie (Netflix). I think she could have smushed all four books into one. I can see why Bella and Edward/Jacob appeal to young girls, as their love is so idealized and perfect. Just like real life!
Now if Edward and Jacob were together… now that would be a book.
john – funny cartoon. Except Bella was smiling and not the dour, buzzkill I remember. Love the rainbow and the sparkling.
Xi_Heather – Looks like it’s you, me and Craig for the Hannah Montana movie. Any other takers?
Michelle: I think Enrico wanted to go too. I’ll just stand outside the theatre and heckle you guys.
Tam: From what I understand from google maps, Big Beaver is just south of New Beaver. I’m not making this up people, just trying to get to a family wedding.
But on google maps Colombus OH doesn’t look that far from Big Beaver PA
That was a reference to that guy who’s name starts with Dave S.
Just kidding Dave S. (If you’re reading this) I have no time for stalking this weekend.
Tam: I think I’d join you.
Mark, in south central PA, on the other side of Lancaster, very short distances from each other we have Intercourse, Paradise AND Fertility PA.
Who knew those puritanical Quakers in the olden days were so risque in their naming of towns!
HUGS…
Oh, and I’m out front with Tam and The Ryan, heckling and cupcake eatin’!
HUGS…
I spent part of the morning reading the new Dresden Files book, so work doesn’t feel long yet.
I love Intercourse and Paradise, But you can keep Fertility. Of course I’m only talking about the towns.
There used to be a street near hear called “Intercouse Lane”, after several street signs were stolen they finally changed the name.
It’s now called Lovers Lane, seriously, just google map “Lovers lane Windsor va 23487″ and you’ll see it in street view.
Polt: The best hotel/motel ever, the “Best Western Intercourse Village Inn & Restaurant”.
http://www.bestwesternpa.com/hotels/best-western-intercourse-village-inn-and-restaurant/
There’s even a restaurant….Intercourse AND Food!!!! This place was made for me!
I would like to open an adult store on Lovers Lane. It would get a TON of free media coverage and my store would thrive.
Oh and cupcakes and heckling Brilliant idea.
Ryan: Everyone raved about the Dresden files books and I read the first one but I just couldn’t get into it. I think its the first person POV. Its pretty rare that works for me. I’m saving Hero and Vintage for the train ride Sunday. Both YA so I can trade off with my daughter.
Mark: I can’t believe someone hasn’t petitioned to changed that town’s name. How can you say that with a straight face when you meet someone?
Tam: Great idea, I’ll be in there every morning drinking free coffee.
There will be free coffee, right?