Okay so the project I work for is getting shut down and I’ll most likely be out a job in a few months. So I need to start weighing my options for future lines of work. So far this is all I could come up with:
Super Villain
Houseboy
Genie
Phone Sex Operator
I’m screwed.
Hmmm. I vote for Super Villain. DAMN the cancellation of Pushing Daisies!!! But don’t joke about being a house boy, I bet they’re not losing their jobs right now. The rich are still rich!!
I’m sorry this is happening and hope you are able to find something soon.
By the way, gay Elmer Fudd, isn’t that redundant? Love the argyle undies and the eye patch.
Well that sucks. Sorry about the job. Loved the argyle undies though. I’m not sure about the genie option. Do you have a lamp or a bottle you could use for this? I think there is the whole “must possess magic” thing too. However I’m pretty sure you already have the requisite skills for the other jobs.
Good luck.
I am sorry to hear about your situation. With your good looks, charisma and gumption I am confident that you have a good chance to find another job. In the meantime you may have a little time to work on your writing. I wish you all the best. Your dancing monkeys are here to provide support.
On the bright side, unemployment can be kind of fun
… You get to sleep in and have Martini Time at 3PM!
I think you can add Movie Critic to the list — I know our newspaper has a real lack of critics who use the word “squealed”. And of course Author is already on the list and checked, except for the whole money-making thing.
It’s good that you have a few months so that you can start looking in earnest now.
Well, you know it’s a tough world out there, so good luck with the job hunt. However, since you have been saving up so much for this future home with the man of your dreams, at least you probably have a large savings cushion, and the living at home thing will also help. But I also think this might be the disguised opportunity to start working on those creative projects in earnest.
By the way, Avitable, who is this guy Earnest that we keep talking about? And will Craig need proctology training in order to look into him?
Perhaps you should get your career profile in order with sites like linkedin and monster. Also professional level staffing/placement firms have helped me before.
Thanks for your support everyone!
Xi_Heather: I also think all movie reviews should talk about people’s hair.
Avitable: Maybe I can earn fame and fortune by winning your moob contest and I won’t need a job!
David: Unfortunately I just emptied my savings into my student loans about a month ago. Bad timing. And don’t worry, I have PLENTY of proctology training.
Rob: Thanks! I keep meaning to sign up with LinkedIn. And I’m working with a headhunter now, who will hopefully be able to help me out.
You’re screwed? You will be with the houseboy option…just sayin…
Sorry to hear about your situation, but I’m sure you’ll get something without a problem. How could anyone NOT hire you. If nothing else, you go into the Argyle Ninja business.
And is there a particular reason why the genie one looks like there’s a set of large yellow buttocks behind him?
HUGS…
OK, I had to come out of retirement for this one. Because it hits so close to home. I Feel Ya!
But aren’t you glad you didn’t commit to a mortgage a few weeks ago. At least you have a Great Family behind you. I know it can be scary, but you’ll be fine. I promise. Going back into semi-retirement now, but you know I have to add the following:
I’d go with phone sex operator, there have to be some argyle fetishists out there, somewhere. Or what about Poolboy, You can clean my skimmers anytime.
Eew, that sound disgusting, even to me.
Time to set out a tip jar here at Puntabulous Craig. And Polt, no comments please about giving the tip to Craig….
Leave the country like me! it’s worth it.
My vote is for houseboy!!!!
Mark: argyle fetishists….you crack me up, man.
Hayden: How scary it is that you’ve read my mind like that…..
HUGS…
Craig, if you had a body like Dave S I bet you could be a go-go dancer. Go-go dancing is fun!
jomo: You aren’t in the states?
Believe me, I’ve figured out how to work the system. I’m comfortable and lead the life of a true raconteur.
That said, houseboy. Why waste your youth?
Tony P: I can read that last sentence two ways.
1) You say houseboy with disgust, and follow up with a why waste my youth cleaning houses (and more) for skeevy old men in my underwear?
or
2) You are picking houseboy as my future career, and follow up with a better do it now while you’re still young!
Craig: “I’m working with a headhunter now” Aren’t all men technically head hunters?
How about children’s book author?
I don’t think you’d make a good super villain (and I hate competition), you’re to sweet.
LOL! @ john. Precisely!
Jere: I think children’s book author at this point is about as likely as genie. At least until I get the damn thing written.
Wait, you mean you don’t get paid to entertain us? Weird! =Þ
Best of luck. I am sure something will come your way, hopefully not a flying toilet seat….. (Dead like me for the win!)
I say you just bring SV&VG to the execs at Cartoon Network and see what happens.
If I had the money to be a sugar daddy I would so hire you as a houseboy, sadly that is not the case. Until I win the lottery perhaps you can use this opportunity to focus on your writing. I am sure there are plenty of dancing monkeys here that would be happy to proofread for you.
I’d suggest going to school to become Dr. Puntabulous, but the timing sucks. You’d still have to find something to do between now and Fall 2010.
Cupcake: Ooo, Dr. Puntabulous does have a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?
Personally I think Dr. Cupcake sounds better. How about it Ryan?
Christian Jay: I bought the boxed set of Dead Like Me. I’m really looking forward to watching it over the summer!
M. Nico: I’ll keep my fingers crossed that you win!
Enrico: After I finish up the Master Bader storyline I will surely have them banging down my door.
Craig: That should happen sometime between now and spring 2013.
Ugh I feel your pain sweetie. On the upside the argyle manties are HAWT!
Maybe visual artist? Make huge ass paintings with Paint. That would be original. Your composition in the first one is actually working, though I would prefer the unfilled oval to be circle and I would have made the line the same blue as the small square to balance the top.
I’ll be Dr. Bruno eventually if all goes according to plan. But I’ll let you guys call me Dr. Enrickyricardo if you must.
Enrico: What letters would go with your D?
TRWTC and Enrico: Jeez, you guys are making me feel like a slacker for stopping with a BS. Sigh… maybe one day when the kids are older I will go on to be Dr. Nicodemus.
Dr. Enrickyricardo, Mr. Enrickyricardo, Mrs. Rnrickyricardo, Ms. Enrickyricardo, Sgt. Enrickyricardo….your title is irrelevant, you shall always be Enrickyricardo to me.
Craiggers, I don’t have the money to pay you to be my houseboy either, but if you want to practice, I’ll offer my home to you for that purpose. And since I’m rather messy, you won’t even have all that much to do. Just stand around in your argyle speedo. Stand provocatively, of course.
HUGS…
polt: I’ve never heard of houseboy internships before.
Would Pushing Daisies be the only show that you’d renew through supervillianery?
You can come be our houseboy! We won’t even make you work out.
Nope. I’d also demand Veronica Mars, Privileged, Arrested Development, and Firefly.
Mel: Sweet! I knew I didn’t draw a six pack on me for a reason! When can I start? And how much do you pay?
Craig: I’d suggest Terminator and Carnivale as well.
Hey, Craig, I just wanted to jump in and say that I’m sorry your job is ending.
That’s really scary to be perfectly honest. But with all your talent, I trust you’ll be fine. My last day at my job is June 26th.
And that phone sex operator panel was absolutely hilarious!!! Holy crap, I had tears in my eyes I was laughing so hard.
You could always strip for a living.
This is the cutest post ever : ).
I think you should be a psychic. I was trying to figure out what I should do and put it on facebook last night. Or maybe I’m psychic, because it obviously took you some time to create those wonderful panels.
I think a Puntabulous book should be in the making. I’d buy it.
And stripping is always an option. Dave S. could recommend a few songs to get you started.
Dave S: Whew! Good to see you, I was getting worried; I was begining to think Jonah had gone OJ on you.
Dur. Sorry Dave, how the hell did I miss your comment? Better get my eyes checked.
http://graphjam.com/2009/05/21/song-chart-memes-doing-phd/
M. Nicodemus: hmmmm, not a bad idea
Dave S: this isn’t about your last day, it is about Craigs….
Craig: Sorry to hear about the job, I bet after getting tan and buff all summer you will land a great job by September!
The Future Doctor Cupcake: The PhDs I work with, of which there are many say that it stands for piled high and deep. (the Mrs. is starting hers in January)
Jonah: Don’t go OJ, you should go Claus Von Bulow, he has a little more class.
Enrico: Ooo, can we go with Dr. Ricky?
Craig: The only way I’m getting a 6 pack is by drawing it on or going to the liquor store. I almost used the MA vernacular of “package store” but I was shopping for 6 packs, not packages.