This weekend we went out to my Aunt’s beach house in Southold on the north fork of Long Island. She wasn’t able to use it this weekend so she offered it up to us. It’s a great little house:
And it’s only a hop, skip, and a jump to the beach.
Check out that view!
And that shower! You haven’t lived until you’ve showered (naked!) outdoors. It’s just so liberating! I’m sure Polt has pictures. He wasn’t there, but you know how they say sharks can smell a drop of blood in a square mile of ocean? Well he can smell naked bloggers within the entire continental United States. Hawaii and Alaska if there’s a strong breeze.
It’s not a vacation if Dad isn’t asleep on the couch with a book in his hand:
The next morning I made my awesome mimosas. I say they’re awesome, but they’re ridiculously easy to make. That’s the only way I’d be able to make them. But Amanda taught me that if you add a dash of raspberry liquor it adds a nice touch! And it does!
And then I proceeded to drink most of them by myself while still in my pajamas! Mom made bloody marys, but I think mixing alcohol with tomato juice is a total waste of perfectly good alcohol.
Dad wore the shirt Michelle got him, which reads “Yet, despite the look on my face, you’re still talking.” If you know my Dad, you’ll know it’s perfect for him.
Here’s Mom, Amanda, and our cousin Ronnie:
Amanda and our Uncle Ernest:
Now you can’t go out to Eastern Long Island without visiting the vineyards, so here are me and Amanda with our cousins Amy and Kim who were out touring the vineyards for my cousin Gail’s birthday. Aren’t we a good looking family? We’re even better looking when we’re looking at the same camera.
Here’s Gail and her five (FIVE!) girls:
Here we are tasting wine. By the looks on our faces, I’m pretty sure we’re just waiting for the guy to stop talking so we can taste the wine.
Here’s a cute one of Mom and Dad:
And one of us sitting outside:
Amanda and our cousin (and one of her godchildren) Spencer:
I like this picture of me and Amanda:
And another cute one of Mom and Dad:
And me looking studly (do I ever look any other way?) out by the vines. The sun was in my eyes, which explains the fake “please just take the picture already” smile on my face:
That night we played cards. One of the games we played is called “Screw Your Neighbor” which involves trading cards blindly with your neighbor and trying not to get the lowest card. Anyone who has ever had the dubious honor of sitting next to me knows that I always get dealt low cards so if they need to trade with me they are doomed. By the smile on my face I have a feeling I just screwed my neighbor.
A fun weekend was had by all!
M.Nico: I think Polt’s brush might be in a different state.
I waited tables for many years, no one ever said they wanted to paint me, there was the one time I was waiting on Mel Brooks and Ann Bancroft and when Mel ordered his lobster I said “It’s good to be the king” and Ann replies “It’s better to be the queen”, ah words to live by.
As for creepy old guy encounters, I once made $50 for showing some guy my junk, he had heard some things. Geez $50 to see MY junk, good thing I didn’t make a career of that!
John: Ummm, what (who?) is your avatar? That’s no bunny.
M.Nico: I heard about this guy before. Sounds like a bad idea to me.
Paul: Mel Brooks?? Well I served a more famous celebrity-Caroline Rhea! Aka Sabrina’s aunt on Sabrina the Teenage Witch! Oh, and last summer, Governor Spitzer’s prostitute came in and everyone was so excited.
Tam: I was wondering the same thing!
I’m not sure who she is. It is from a movie or show and it shows a woman through out her life making that monkey face and it makes me laugh.
I love to shower outside. We rented a house in Chatham on Cape Cod with an outside shower. I begged my husband to put one in our backyard, no luck. It looks like a lovely weekend for you and your famiy.
Enrico: And Caroline Rhea is Canadian. Double bonus.
I’ve served a Canadian witch, a famous prostitute, and a Puntabulous dancing monkey. I win.
Well I worked at this place for 1 day!
http://www.clipupload.com/clip/showphoto.php/photo/9607/cat//Classic%20SNL:%20The%20Restaurant%20Enterprise
BWAHAHAHA< yeah, Enrickyricardo, it’d be hard to top that.
Waited on Mel Brooks, fo Realz? (my josh homage) That’d be awesome. I was in Borders when the governor of Maryland and his state police bodyguard came in for coffee. I was’t there when Robert Duval was in. I did get to meet Doc Sevrenson there. And I waited on the local TV news anchor. Yeah, that’s about it for my brushes with fame and celebrities.
And M.Nico, I’m not at all sure my brush would be condusive to painting if it were Enrickyricardo.
HUGS…
Polt: I would think that it’d be MORE conducive to painting in that state, no? Paintbrushes aren’t floppy you know. But I guess it’d be difficult for that man to paint if he could only do it aroused. haha.
Tam & Polt: I’ll make sure I do extra squatz just to make sure mis nalgas are in prime shape!
John: I have a Josh tranzlator. It costz fifty monez or a bag of caramel cremes (I motherflipping lovez those tingz! Derri.cio.so!
Enricocopters: I served famed poet Paul Muldoon and writer Joyce Carol Oates and neither of them were the least bit friendly.
I used to work for Charles Schultz when I was in high school, but he was kind of an ass so that was nothing to be jelous of.
Enrickyricardo: A paint brush isn’t rigid either. It’d be like painting with the handle of the brush and not the bristles. I guess, I mean it’s not like I’ve tried or anything…
josh: not sure what a nalgas is, but the better shape you’ve got it in, the better off we’ll all be. I guess, I mean it’s not like I’ve tried or anything…
HUGS…
Polt: It will be a good thing: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=nalgas
Josh: Caramel cremes? I guess the way to a boy’s heart really is through his stomach.
Wait, when did we move on to showing our junk? I’ve never been offered money for that, but I have gotten a few propositions over my feet. Apparently they look good to the fetishists.
Yeah, you just haven’t lived until you’ve showered outside.
While everyone was busy checking out Craig’s curvaceous butt, I also noticed a moderately bulging bicep in the photo of him holding the Champagne bottle. Impressive.
A friend was competing in the Ms. Faghag competition in NYC, and Caroline Rhea as a judge. I thought she was pretty funny.
Enrico may not have had the energy to flirt with my friend and I much, but we did have a nice hug, since I didn’t jump out the window this time.
He gives good hugs.
All you cute flirty waiters (and waitresses) are just devaluing your flirtation. Now, when you have a customer who you are legitimately interested in they won’t take your flirtations seriously.
But at least you will be rich, from all the tips. 