Dear Adulthood. You suck big time. Like, major suckage. Here are the things I miss about my childhood:
1. Summers off. Can you imagine having the entire summer off? With zero responsibilities whatsoever? You could get up and eat your bowl of cereal in front of the television while watching cartoons and The Price is Right till your heart’s content. Then you get to high school and suddenly you have a job, and even though you’re off from school, it only means that you can work more hours serving crappy food to the scum of the universe.
2. Legos! Seriously, I had the most awesome Lego castle when I was younger. Like, if you think your Lego castle was awesome, I can guarantee that mine was ten times more awesome. And no, it wasn’t one of those that you bought in a box and put together by following the instructions. It was one I made myself full of my own imagination and secret rooms and hidden doorways. There was even a village! With a baker! And hidden under the oven was a secret entrance into the castle! I would spend HOURS tinkering with that castle. Could you imagine doing that these days? Who has time anymore?
3. No Dating. Remember when everyone outside your circle of friends was icky? But soon puberty hit and you wanted to tap every ass in sight and our lives have been crap ever since. Now we go on dates and chances are if you like the person, they assume you have the bubonic plague and are never heard from again. Did I mention that’s the lesser of two evils? Most of the time the dates are so bad, that their only redeeming value is that they give you stories to tell your friends.
4. Eating whatever you want. This was a luxury I was able to enjoy until recently. Even throughout college my 6 foot 4 frame held a mere 170 pounds. These days I’m pushing 200 and I may or may not have a muffin top.
5. Ignorance was bliss. Terrorism? Politics? STDs? We were clueless! I hardly knew the Persian Gulf War was even going on! And it’s not like I was four years old at the time. I was nine! And I will never forget the time our health teacher had us read silently to ourselves about erect penises being inserted into vaginas. Shudderz!
What do you miss about being a kid?
Regarding #1, friend of mine is a school psychologist. He gets summers off and I’m so jealous.
As to #2, the Legos, just because you’re an adult doesn’t mean you can’t play with lego.
josh, regarding #3: You make me laugh and cry at the same time.
Ryan: She looks freaking hot. That’s what. LOL Ummm. She goes to weddings and funerals of other heads of state. She runs around our country making people think the government cares about them. She gives out awards. She officially meets new ambassadors in a special ceremony I have prepared notes for but never been privy to due to my lowly status on the totem pole. She hosts a tea party at her house every summer and a winter festival in, well winter. She signs off on laws although I think everyone would faint if she ever said no. She talks to the queen now and then. That’s about it. Oh and she looks hot. Did I mention that? Too bad her husband looks like this. He frightens me.
Well crap, the scary picture didn’t work. Try THIS.
Paul: I totally had one of those too!
Josh: Keep the faith, there really is someone out there who will love you right.
Michelle: How many siblings do you have? What did you get all the good and he got all the ass?
Tam: MROW! She is quite lovely.
John: Michelle got all the class.
Tam: Now what didn’t I think of that?!
Tam: Ack! What a terror.
Josh: yeah, I think I remember that!!!!!!
Tam: This is a much scarier picture of the couple.
Ryan: He looks like her Grandpa. I couldn’t eat it, but hey, people up there have been living on it for centuries and have survived.
This is all I have to say about her husband:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4AcgjQmpsU
Paul: FTW! That made me laugh and I needed it today.
Paul: Funny.
Well, with 8 kids one of us was bound to be a jerk. Yeah, Klassy with a “K”. It’s not too classy of me to call him an ass. Maybe I’ll refer to him as “difficult”.
Poor Viceregal consort. I’m sure he has a wonderful personality.
I don’t remember that turtle thing. Maybe it was after my time. I do remember playing on the Sit ‘N Spin (shut up) until I wanted to throw up.
Paul: I had that speeder too! I was such a Star Wars action figure slut, you name it, I had it. That is until this tool of a kid across the street destroyed most of the vehicles and buried everything else in the empty field down the street
At least now I get to buy all the cool stuff for my kids to play with 
I had an Erector Set that I thought was pretty cool, along with the Legos and Lincoln Logs.
Singing and dancing to Saturday morning cartoon themes with my sisters.
The Brady Bunch and all those silly Krofft Brothers shows (HR Puffnstuff, who’s your friend when things get rough?) And Chispirito.
No crisis was too big not to be solved by a bowl of rocky road with Grampa.
Snow days.
Ladies, what about Barbie? Enough said!
And TMNT – before they re-vamped them, and they sucked ass.
And lets not forget how it’s totally ok to have really bad taste in music when you’re a kid. When you grow up and still have that same bad taste in music (which I know nothing about) you get a ton of shit for it! (that’s just what I hear from a friend).
And though I might get a ton of crap for this one, I miss life before cell phones.
Also, eating ice cream cones in the summer heat and letting it drip all over my face ( wait, I still do that…)